(Bonus Episode) Where Are You REALLY?

(Bonus Episode) Where Are You REALLY?

Have you ever been in a big shopping mall where you were trying to get to a particular store, but you didn’t know where you were in relation to it — so you had no idea which direction to turn? Then you found one of those maps that showed the layout of the mall and had an X that said, “You are here’ — and instantly you knew which way to go!

You can’t get where you want until you know where you are.

This seems obvious on the surface, and when it comes to simple things like finding our way through a mall, it’s fairly easy to figure out. But when it comes to finding our way to more important destination and accomplishing higher priorities, getting clear on where we are requires a different kind of map, and a deeper kind of work.

In the Truman Show, starring Jim Carrey, his character could never go beyond a certain area of his town. Try as he might, when he hit a certain street or the edge of the lake, he was overcome with mental and emotional anxiety and had to stop. He didn’t even remember why initially, all he knew was that it was dangerous to go further.

Because the world he lived in was false, made up by someone else as an experiment, there had to be boundaries that he would never go beyond — or else he would break the illusion and the reality show would be over. To make sure he would stay within those boundaries, he had been conditioned through fearful experience as a boy so that he wouldn’t go beyond the known borders.

This same level of conditioning has been used on circus elephants, where they are raised with a strong rope around their neck, a rope that holds the baby elephant. As it grows up, the rope can no longer restrain it, however, because it has felt the pull and the restraint for so long, it believes it is stuck in place. So much so that even during one great circus fire, the elephants never tried to escape, believing they couldn’t.

This is called learned helplessness. It’s a state of mind and being where we believe we are stuck with certain limitations that are no longer true, or maybe never were.

How this relates to your life now is that, in the areas where you seem stuck, limited, or feel like you’ll never make it, you’re experiencing a level of conditioning making it look and feel that way — but it’s a lie. You aren’t where you really think you are, what you really think you are, or who you really think you are. You are so much more, but you have been conditioned to be trapped.

The problem, like with Truman, is that we don’t know what we don’t know. We don’t know what we’re believing that is false, and we don’t know what the truth is. We’re not actually experiencing reality, we’re experiencing our limited perception of it — like taking a picture of a small part of a vast landscape, and calling that picture reality!

We don’t have choice or free will without expanded awareness, without knowing what we’re believing and the patterns we’re reacting to. This is why all the great master teachers and teachings include some form of meditation and contemplation as part of the practice. As the great Oracle of Delphi says, ‘Know Thyself.’ That’s what we must do.

We must be willing to get really honest with where we are, what we believe, and how we feel. You can’t heal what you won’t feel. That energy remains stuck, unconsciously wreaking havoc on your life. But when you bring this unconscious material to the surface and challenge it with the truth of your being — now real healing, growth, and ultimate freedom can happen.

That’s what happened with Truman. He finally confronted his deepest fears and worked through them — finally realizing they had no power to hurt him. Once he broke through this, he could keep going, past the perceived boundaries, and break out of the limited world he had grown up in.

The key to his transformation was his desire. He has a bigger vision for his life and a deep love, giving him the fuel to face his fears, overcome his foes, and keep going until he achieved his freedom!

What is that burning desire in you that you want more than anything? What are you willing to risk for, to work hard for, to face your fears and even die for? You won’t have to literally die, but some part of you will have to — the old identity, the old protective habits.

The challenge is that the human mind is designed to avoid pain and move towards pleasure. It’s an evolutionary mechanism that was designed to help the developing human survive before we had the higher levels of cognition that allowed us to think more deeply about life and our choices. But this same program that helped us survive now puts us on the verge of extinction.

To override this, we have to be willing to challenge our beliefs and experiences, to dig deeper and find out who we really are, where we really are, and why we are alive – and then to design a way of life that is in integrity with that. It’s not easy because of this survival mechanism, but it is possible – and it’s necessary if we’re going to live our full potential and highest purpose.

To begin overriding this limited program, you can start with the Prayer of Awakening: “More than I want to fix, change, heal, control anyone or anything, I want to wake up to the truth that makes me free. I want to know who and what I really am and why I’m alive. I want to see with the eyes of God, feel with the heart of God, know the truth.”

That prayer can, in and of itself, begin to bring up everything that’s in the way and even start to heal or release the limited patterns. It’s a powerful intention.

The second prayer or intention is, “I’m willing to see and feel all the things I’ve been avoiding, all the things I’ve been afraid to look at, and let everything that is not serving me anymore come up to be embraced, redeemed, transmuted, or released — come what may.”

On a regular basis, you can also ask yourself, “Where am I really? What am I really? Why am I here? What do I really believe? What do I really feel?” This will continue to make you a candidate for fresh insights and healing activations.

Remember, you can’t get to where you really want to go, to where you’re destined to go, unless you’re honest with where you really are – and willing to live here, fully present to whatever exists. That’s the journey I invite you on and welcome you to. It’s one trip where you’re guaranteed to lose your baggage on and be happy about it!

To support you in mastering this, Listen to the in-depth podcast on the subject, where we break it down and put it into real-life practice TODAY. This will be a real game-changer.

To Your Emergence!

And remember, self-help is shelf help – you have everything you need already!

Stay inspired!

Derek

Other powerful free trainings in the podcast library:

When to Stay the Course, When to Change Directions
Why ALL Your Beliefs Limit You (And What You Should Do Instead)
Why Going With the Flow is Wrong

To get these trainings now or see more episodes available, CLICK HERE!

PS – Like this episode? Please share it! Want more advanced training? Full Transcript

[The following is the full transcript of this episode of the Emergence, A Revolutionary Path for Radical Life Change, with Derek Rydall Podcast]

Greetings, everyone, my fellow Emergineers. Derek Rydall here, the founder of the Law of Emergence and author of the best-selling book, Emergence. It’s just great to be with you again as we continue this journey of never-ending, ever-expanding, always unfolding growth and potential. Just think about that. There is no limit to how much good you can realize and express. There is no limit in your body. We think about our body as being just as material thing that is limited to whatever we’ve experienced so far humanly. The body is actually infinite. It has the potential to infinitely and eternally unfold new capacities, new strengths, new talents, new gifts, new abilities, the mental body, the emotional body, the astral, the etheric, all the subtle bodies, the physical body, and your entire body of affairs. It’s that infinite potential, infinite abundance, infinite genius, infinite love, peace, joy, beauty, freedom, wisdom, creativity, infinite. No matter what feeling you have seen, no matter what your culture or your parents or your school or the world says, there’s infinite potential remaining.

It’s something to think about, because we bump into so many beliefs, so many experiences with your coagulated beliefs and the human laws, which are also just coagulated beliefs, and it’s very tempting to think this is it like in the Truman Show, the movie with Jim Carrey could not ever go beyond the water, the river, or the ocean, or whatever it was, the lake and certain places. Not to go beyond this street, this lake, because it was a fake world, it was a circumscribed world. Everybody outside of it knew, and even inside of it, except for him. He had been conditioned and grown up in this world and had experiences like almost drowning in the boat, or his brother drowning or whatever the case was, in the storm, and so he had this conditioned fear. It kept him in this circumscribed little world, until one day, because of his desire for love, for freedom, he eventually was willing to push beyond those boundaries to discover what was really true, what was really there, and ultimately became free of that particular world and discovered a whole new bigger world.

It’s also like the actual reality of the elephant that ultimately died in a circus fire. They were staked to the ground with these ropes, but they could have easily pulled the ropes out and just stormed out of the tent and would never have been hurt, but they stood there and burned to death. Why? Because as little elephants, they had been trained to believe that they couldn’t move. When they were little, they were staked with a strong rope or a chain. They would feel that, and they couldn’t move. As they got older and older even just a feeling of the tug of the rope made them think that they were still stuck, that they couldn’t move, even though they could have easily just pulled it out of the ground and trampled over everybody and stormed out. They sat there feeling the tug of the rope, believing they couldn’t move, and ultimately they didn’t have the ability to question. They didn’t have the ability to question their reality, what they were thinking or feeling, and they ended up dying. There’s many experiments like this. There’s the one with the fish in the tank where they have a fish on one side, a glass partition, and then the food on the other. The fish bumps up against the glass over and over again, can’t get to the food, eventually gives up, goes back. They remove the glass, and the fish keeps swimming in circles. It’ll swim right up to where the glass used to be, stare at the food, and then swim back and end up starving to death, even though the food was available to it the whole time. So, what does this all have to do with what we’re talking about today? I have no idea. No, I’m just kidding.

We’re talking today about Where are you really? You can’t get where you want until you’re honest with where you are. Another analogy I used for that is if you’ve ever been in the mall, a big shopping mall, and you want to get to a particular store, but you have no idea where to even start unless you look at one of those signs that has like a map of the mall, and it says You are here.It has a big X or an arrow pointing to where you are, and then you can easily go, Oh, okay, so now I know how to get to where I want to go. If I didn’t know where I was, I wouldn’t know is it the right turn or left turn, is it up, is it down, because I have no point of origin. So, we have to know where we are. The problem is, like these examples I just gave – the fish, the elephant, and Truman – is that we don’t know what we are unconsciously reacting to. We don’t know what we’re unconsciously believing. We’re not actually experiencing reality. We’re experiencing our belief about it. We’re experiencing our perceptions about it, the universal perceptions that we’ve also made personal. Like Truman, he didn’t even know he was trapped. The elephants didn’t even know that they were trapped. The fish didn’t even know that he or she could just go get the food. They didn’t realize they were reacting to an unconscious conditioned pattern. They thought they were in one place, but they were really in a very different place. By the way, as I’ve said before, there’s no real free will without this expanded awareness. You think you’re making choice, but you’re really just reacting. You think you have free rein to choose whatever you want. In fact, you really don’t. I mean, you do in truth, but you don’t have access to that level of choice until you have enough expanded awareness to see what you’ve been unconsciously reacting to, the beliefs, the condition patterns, the undigested emotional content, the beliefs of your culture, of your parents, of the society, etc. and/or the lack of the knowledge of what’s called the letter of truth, which means the spiritual principles. So, to the extent you don’t know those, and to the extent you aren’t aware of what you really think and believe and feel and perceive, to that extent, you have XY access. To that extent, there’s a corollary to how much of that you don’t know, to how limited your real freedom and real choice is, but you’re dreaming a dream that you have a choice. That’s one of the tricks of the ego, because you’re thinking you’re making all these choices and that you have free will, but really it’s doing that and keeping you circumscribed in your own little Truman show, in your own little circus tent. The challenge is that the human mind is designed to avoid pain and move towards pleasure, which is one of the ways they train an animal, right? They crack the whip, or they give it food. When it does the thing they want to condition it to, they give it food. When it doesn’t do the thing they want to condition it to, they crack the whip, and eventually the animal develops that pattern, that habit, that conditioning through pain and pleasure. Eventually, that becomes its reality. The same exact thing is happened to us.

By the way, as I’ve said before, there’s no real free will without this expanded awareness. You think you’re making choice, but you’re really just reacting. You think you have free rein to choose whatever you want. In fact, you really don’t. I mean, you do in truth, but you don’t have access to that level of choice until you have enough expanded awareness to see what you’ve been unconsciously reacting to, the beliefs, the condition patterns, the undigested emotional content, the beliefs of your culture, of your parents, of the society, etc. and/or the lack of the knowledge of what’s called the letter of truth, which means the spiritual principles. So, to the extent you don’t know those, and to the extent you aren’t aware of what you really think and believe and feel and perceive, to that extent, you have XY access. To that extent, there’s a corollary to how much of that you don’t know, to how limited your real freedom and real choice is, but you’re dreaming a dream that you have a choice. That’s one of the tricks of the ego, because you’re thinking you’re making all these choices and that you have free will, but really it’s doing that and keeping you circumscribed in your own little Truman show, in your own little circus tent. The challenge is that the human mind is designed to avoid pain and move towards pleasure, which is one of the ways they train an animal, right? They crack the whip, or they give it food. When it does the thing they want to condition it to, they give it food. When it doesn’t do the thing they want to condition it to, they crack the whip, and eventually the animal develops that pattern, that habit, that conditioning through pain and pleasure. Eventually, that becomes its reality. The same exact thing is happened to us.

So, the challenge is then to subvert or override that mechanism. We have to actually do what is completely counterintuitive and counter to our human nature which is to not participate in the pain and pleasure mechanism, to not let our mere pleasure and our movement towards feeling good, determine what we’re willing to look at and challenge, and to not let our fear of feeling pain, which can feel like more than just a fear. It can feel like a matter of survival, because the ego doesn’t know the difference between emotional pain and physical danger. We have to override that whole evolutionary mechanism, which can really feel like we’re crazy, like we’re going against our nature. It’s there initially as a way to help these organisms that did not have high level of cognition, that were just much more reactionary before our brain was developed. There had to be a way that this human species could survive. It had to be like an animal, which is to basically avoid pain and danger and move towards pleasure. Moving towards pleasure would mean sex, would mean procreation, would mean food, would mean survival, would mean moving away from pain, would be avoiding anything that had a sign of danger which could lead to being hurt, being killed. It’s a good idea when you got a developing species that does not have the capacity to think about what it’s thinking about, metacognition. It doesn’t have self-consciousness, so it can’t go, Well, it looks like that dangerous, but let me investigate it. We couldn’t do that, so we have the ability to just be moving around like an animal with instinct, move away from pain, and move towards pleasure. It helped. It allowed us to survive. It allowed us to ultimately populate the planet.

Now, that same mechanism is preventing us from evolving and growing outside of our circumscribed little world. So, we have to override that. That can feel really hard, really challenging, really scary. Everything in our body and mind can try to convince us that we shouldn’t go that way, because we’re not used to that. It just seems like a very dark mysterious place to go to. It’s like that analogy of the guy that’s outside of his house searching for his key, and his neighbor said, Where did you lose it? The guy is like looking in all the bushes under the street lamp. The neighbor is helping him. After an hour, the neighbor said, Where did you lose the key? because they’ve been looking all over. The guy said, Well, I lost it inside the house, but the light is better out here. So, that’s the way we are. It’s dark and scary to go into the mystery, the cave of mystery, the cave of our evolutionary potential and really discover where am I really. Then, you get into a spiritual path, and you learn about visualization and affirmation and all these feel-good tools, which are beautiful, but then the ego uses them to cover us what we really feel, to cover up what we really believe. So, you’ll hear people saying, Well, no, I mean I know God is all there is but…͟ and then you’ll hear me say, Ah, ah, ah, no, you don’t really know God is all there is.That’s just a nice concept and an affirmation to cover up the fact that you really believe you’re lost and alone in a cold and unfriendly Universe. So, let’s get down to what you really believe. Why? Because you can’t get to where you really want to go if you aren’t honest with where you really are. You can’t heal what you’re not willing to feel. That doesn’t mean you necessarily have to feel every little grain of emotion you’ve ever experienced, but it definitely means you have to be willing, open, available, and to really look at your beliefs.

Again, this is very counter human nature. People go to war for their beliefs. People kills for their beliefs. People bomb abortion clinics and beat people up and stand on a pulpit and rain fire and brimstone down on a congregation and scare them into their little caves of limited belief to fight for belief. To say I’m going to question all of my believes, especially my core one, the mind is going to think you’re crazy, and it’s going to feel very dangerous, but if you really want to wake up, and you really want to be free and you really want to have free will and choice, you must. You must shine the light of your awareness into the dark cave of your consciousness and see what’s really lurking there. Only then can you transmute that energy, those undigested emotions. Can you question those limited beliefs? It may not even seem limited at first. Truman doesn’t know he’s living in a limited world. That’s the trick of it, right? We don’t realize even the greatest human life is living in limitation compared to what’s possible. We have to stay open at the top. We have to stay beginner’s mind, students, and question everything, like a little kid does before they start to get solidified beliefs. Why is the sky blue? Why? Why is that? What is happening there? Why is the Grand Canyon look like that? Why do dogs sniff each other’s butts? So many things they’ve got to question. A kid does that until they get either told, Stop asking so many questions or The sky is just blue because it’s blue or we just get told complete BS, right? Belief Systems. Eventually, we just buy it. We believe it, either through pain or fear or shame or survival or exhaustion. We just buy into things, and we go along, and we try to live our lives within those programs. We wonder why we hit feelings and we got stuck and we can’t get to the next level. We’re experiencing things, limitations that others don’t.

So, we have to be willing to look. We have to have the courage to really look, because remember the ego perceives pain. Because we perceive certain things as painful, we have assigned the meaning that it’s dangerous, that it’s shameful, that it’s scary, that it’s painful, and then we have to create a coping mechanism to not feel that feeling anymore. We’ve talked about this with the shadow work, and it’s how we developed our shadows or the values conflicts. One of my friends, Jeffrey Van Dyke, I think it’s one of the most brilliant definitions of wounds. I’m paraphrasing, but he says, A wound is when you have to believe a lie in order to survive. There’s something that is inherently against your soul’s knowing of who you really are. The parent says, Rich people are whatever or says something, If you don’t go to church, you’re going to be burned in hell or just something about you, We’re just a family of people that aren’t very creative or You can’t make it as an artist. Artists live below the poverty level. Something. Maybe you’re standing up and asking for what you really want, and your parent shames you into believing that’s being selfish and a bad person. In your soul, you know that’s not true, but the threat of pain and danger and rejection if you keep believing that truth and knowing that truth becomes so painful that you have to eventually decide to believe that you really aren’t creative, that you really are a bad person, that whatever the case may be so that you can continue to survive and be taken care of and ultimately make it in this world. That’s a wounding. I call that core wounding, also a core initiation, because it’s really setting you up to have a deeper journey of transformation. It’s setting you on a journey to dig deeper and discover something about yourself that you’re here to discover and ultimately bring that wisdom to the world.

So, we create these coping mechanisms. They become very well-developed over time to where we literally don’t feel all the emotional pain that’s going on inside of us anymore. Believe me, it’s still going on inside of you, and it’s still running the show. It’s taking the potential currency that’s coming in everyday for you to invest in your life. It’s using it up to keep that emotional pain alive. You have to create a coping mechanism, some form of habit or compulsive behavior, mental, emotional, physical behaviors to keep that emotional pain out of consciousness. That’s also using up a lot of your energy and capacity. Whatever is left over, that’s all you’ve got now to create your life. If you’ve got so many of these going on, you not only have very little left over, you end up in energetic death. You have to start pulling it from the cells of your body, from other people. You become like an energy vampire, so there’s an extreme version of that. In any case, you’re stuck at certain levels, because you have to use all this energy to keep this old level alive, but you don’t even know you’re doing it. You beat your head against the wall, you try more affirmations, more visualization, more this, more that, but as Debbie Ford, the great teacher of shadow work, once said, That’s like putting ice cream on top of poop. It temporarily makes it look a little prettier, but you do not want to bite it to that sundae. I’m sorry, guys. I’m in a funny mood today, so I’m saying some pretty funny things, some crap things, but you get the point, right? You’re not going to forget that analogy. That’s the key. We have to have the courage to override this system and to really, really discover, where am I really? There’s two prayers. One prayer is, more than I want to fix, change, heal, control anyone or anything, I want to wake up to the truth that makes me free. I want to know who and what I really am and why I’m alive. I want to see with the eyes of God, feel with the heart of God, know the truth. So, that’s one prayer. That prayer can, in and of itself, if you pray it and intend it sincerely and daily, can begin to bring up everything that’s in the way, these unconscious patterns. That’s one approach. That’s just going straight to the truth. Notice within that prayer, it’s saying more than I want to fix, change, heal, manipulate, control, which are all based on coping mechanisms. More than any of that, I want to know the truth that makes me free. What that’s setting us up to is to override those coping mechanisms and ultimately have a realization of what’s really true about us and about life. Often that will bring up those coping mechanisms as they get broken down and chemicalized and start to come to the surface.

That’s the key. We have to have the courage to override this system and to really, really discover, where am I really? There’s two prayers. One prayer is, more than I want to fix, change, heal, control anyone or anything, I want to wake up to the truth that makes me free. I want to know who and what I really am and why I’m alive. I want to see with the eyes of God, feel with the heart of God, know the truth. So, that’s one prayer. That prayer can, in and of itself, if you pray it and intend it sincerely and daily, can begin to bring up everything that’s in the way, these unconscious patterns. That’s one approach. That’s just going straight to the truth. Notice within that prayer, it’s saying more than I want to fix, change, heal, manipulate, control, which are all based on coping mechanisms. More than any of that, I want to know the truth that makes me free. What that’s setting us up to is to override those coping mechanisms and ultimately have a realization of what’s really true about us and about life. Often that will bring up those coping mechanisms as they get broken down and chemicalized and start to come to the surface.

If that’s not enough, sometimes we really do need to also set the intention of the prayer, which is God, life, I’m willing to see and feel all the things I’ve been avoiding, seeing and feeling. I’m willing to see and feel all the things I’ve been afraid to see and feel, the things I’ve been afraid to look at. I’m willing to let everything that is not serving me anymore come up to be seen, to be embraced, to be redeemed or transmuted, all the undigested emotions, all of the uninvestigated beliefs. I’m willing to really see where I am in consciousness, to really feel where I am in consciousness and do the work to heal it, to redeem it, to transmute it, to let it go. Come what may. I’m willing to let go of all of my coping mechanisms, all of my attempts to control and manipulate and refresh and to really see where I really am emotionally, mentally, so that I can ultimately heal, release and know the deeper truth that makes me free and fulfill my greater destiny.

That becomes our prayer, our mantra, our intention. We’re willing, we’re available, we’re open. That alone can start the engine of transformation if you do it with sincerity and with consistency. I know that I recently have become aware that there’s undigested repressed anger in me from several years of me saying yes when I really needed to say no, from me being more of a doormat when I really needed to stand up in family and relationship, and that I was trying to be the nice guy, the good guy, keep the peace, and I realized that all of that left a lot of deposits of unexpressed energy as emotion or pain or that sort of thing. It starts to leak out in certain conversations I would hear in my mind or dreams. I begin to set the prayer. Let all that unconscious emotional stuff come up, so that I can redeem it, transmute it. Sure enough, I started to experience tremendous amounts of anger and sadness, and things came to the surface. The key thing is that it was always there, doing its damage in my system or limiting my capacity, and I just had not been willing to really feel it or look at it, because I had a belief, a shadow around being angry, at least that was years ago. That’s why I didn’t express it, but all that was still undigested. We have to have that level of courage and commitment to really grow, and it might be awkward, and it might be messy at times. You might be a neurotic mess as you start to see this stuff and let this stuff come up. You might find yourself snapping at people or breaking down and crying like Holly Hunter in Broadcast News, everyday wake up and just sob, and then go on with her day. You might find yourself in various states of emotional upheaval or suddenly seeing these beliefs you bought into in being angry or being scared or sad, but having the courage to move through it. That’s what it really takes to grow.

We have to realize that we’ve developed a lot of really good coping mechanisms. We’ve learned how to anesthetize ourselves from what we really feel. We’ve learned how to cover over our real beliefs with stories, excuses and affirmations. You can always see where you’re doing that or attempting to do that when you find yourself saying, I believe this but…͟ or like I said before, I know that I’m supported by the Universe, but whenever you find yourself thinking that or saying that, that’s a sure sign that you have a belief that you’re using to cover up what you really believe and ultimately what you really feel –the fear or the sadness or the shame about what you really believe about life or about yourself. You can’t heal that if you’re not willing to feel bad. Again, it doesn’t mean you’re going to have to feel everything. It just means you have to be willing, you have to be available to let the energy move. I invite you to take a moment right now and look at an area where you’re struggling to overcome or achieve something. What you want to begin to do as you do this process is you can look at all the dimensions of a thing. So, what do you believe about the thing? What do you believe about yourself in relation to the thing? What do you believe about the people involved? What do you believe what they think about you? What do you believe about the world of the thing? What do you believe about the world in general in that context? So, you’re looking at the dimensions of what you believe about the thing.

Let’s say your issue is you’re struggling financially. What you believe about that situation, for real? Not, Oh, God is all there is and I’m truly supported. What do you really believe? What you believe about yourself in relationship to that financial struggle? Not just Oh, I’m doing my best. I’m trying hard. Nothing is working. No, that’s not a belief. What do you believe about yourself? I just don’t understand money. I just don’t know how to do financial stuff. I’m just a loser and a failure around it. My parents said women weren’t any good at that. Okay, what do you believe about the people involved? So, that’s where we start to uncover. Well, I believe that my boss is being a jerk, and he should pay me more or The people that taught me how to do this coaching thing are stupid. It doesn’t work. They’re scam artists. What do you believe about that they think about you, that whatever people involved? Oh, my family thinks I’m a loser, I’m a failure, etc. etc. What do you believe about the world of the thing?

So, now, we expand out a little bit. So, in general, what do you believe about money and finances and bill paying or whatever? Then, you start to go, Well, actually, I think it’s all a bunch of BS. This whole capitalist model is completely wrong. The government should be taking care of…͟ Whatever, right? You start to discover, Wow, that’s what I really believe about it. You might discover I hate money. I think money is the root of all evil. I think like that might have something to do with why I’m broke or struggling. I think that people that have money are usually jerks and mean and insensitive and don’t care about other people. Okay. That might have something to do with why you don’t have a lot of it, because you don’t want to be that kind of a person. What do you believe about the world in general? When you’re in the midst of this now, unpacking it, you ask that question, and you’ll come up with the world is unfair, it’s dog eat dog; it’s every man for himself, or whatever, and you’ll start to discover some beliefs in that arena about the world in general. In other words, that’s the context in which this experience has happened.

So, you start to unpack that. Again, the dimensions are what do you believe about the thing? What do you believe about yourself in relation to the thing? What do you believe about the people involved? They can be directly involved or indirectly involved, just anybody that pops up in your awareness when you’re thinking about that. What do you believe they think about you in relation to the situation? What do you believe about the world of the thing? Then, finally, what do you believe about the world in general within the context of that thing? I’m not expecting you to do all this work right now, but play with it while we’re talking. Start to unpack it a little bit. Again, your intention is, what do I really believe about it? Not what I convinced myself, what am I trying to convince myself of, what does the world say it is, what does Derek say it is? What do I really believe about it? I’m willing to see the truth, even if it’s scary, even if it hurts. What do you really believe about your chances to overcome that or achieve that, whatever the thing is? What do you really believe? I don’t think I’ll ever get out of this mess. I don’t believe I’ll ever really make enough money to pay my bills. Really get honest. Maybe there’s some truth that you’re affirming. I’m supported. Life is for me. What do you really believe about that truth? I think it’s bunch of bullshit, right? You got to get honest. I don’t really believe life is for me. Great. That’s a great start, because as you’re sitting there affirming it about what you really believe is it’s not true, you’re actually affirming the opposite of what you’re saying.

So, what do you really believe? Do you believe in lack? Do you believe in limitation? Do you believe in injustice disease, death? Do you believe these are real things that exist that we have to struggle with? Because if you believe in any of those kinds of things, then you create them as a real obstacle, and now you have to overcome them. If you don’t even realize that you actually believe in lack, because you keep affirming and telling yourself, I’m abundant. I’m abundant. There’s abundance. There’s abundance but what you really believe in is lack. That’s like Sisyphus pushing a bolder up a hill, and then eventually he gets exhausted and the ball pulls back down again, rolls over him. He has to pick it up and push it back up again. You’ve got one foot on the brake and one foot on the gas. You want to really ask that. Then, you go back to that, and you now ask the same questions about how you really feel. How do I really feel about this thing, this situation? How do I really feel about myself in relationship to it? How do I really feel about the people involved, about what they think of me, about the world of this thing, about the world in general? Now, you unpack the feeling. This, for some of us, is even scarier, because you start to go, You know what, I’m really effing angry. I am so, so hurt. I’m so ashamed. I’m so freaking scared. I feel like such an abysmal failure. It just feels like you’re getting sucked into a bottomless pit of emotion. That’s one of the reasons why you don’t go there. It just feels bad, but you can’t heal what you don’t feel.

So, you have to begin to codify it. You have to begin to become conscious of it. There’s the saying, You shall know the truth, and the truth will make you free.It’s true, but it doesn’t just say the truth will make you free. It says you have to know the truth. Truth is all there is, but it doesn’t do you any good until you know it. Just like electricity is everywhere. It doesn’t do you any good until you plug into it. So, the fact that all there is life, love and truth, that does no good unless we’re plugged into it, unless we are consciously knowing it, aware of it, participating it. The same thing is true with healing. It’s the things that we’re unwilling to look at and become conscious of. We cannot ultimately heal or redeem or transmute, because if we’re not willing to look at them it means we’re in resistance to them. What you resist persists. What you fight you fuel. These parts of us, these egoic parts, they know that as long as they remain unconscious, they can survive and even thrive. They can live off of our energy and off of our fears and all of our emotional stuff. As long as they remain unconscious, like the little creatures that scurry around in the dark tunnels, under our front lawn or whatever, or in the sewers, as long as they remain in the dark, they can do their stuff, spread their disease, eat at the roots of our plants and trees, and go on unabated, but the minute we shine a light down those holes, and we bring it all to consciousness, they scurry to the surface, and now we can trap them, stop them, ultimately destroy them or integrate in the case of our own beliefs and feelings.

So, the coping mechanisms are very successful in keeping a lot of this stuff unconscious, so that it can survive. Once it’s brought into the light of our awareness, with consistency, it cannot survive. This is what the Biblical passage of, You cannot see the face of God and live. What it means is you cannot stare into the face of truth, the light, the fire of truth and continue to be the same person you were. It will burn away the false self. It will burn away, and it will transform you and reveal who you really are. The ego knows that, and to the ego that’s death. It’s working very hard to not let you discover where you really are, how you really think, what you really feel, because it knows that will begin the process of dying, of dying to the old self that you may be reborn to your true self. The ego is working 24/7 to prevent. It thinks it’s keeping you alive. It’s just keeping those patterns alive by keeping them in the dark. Your charge now is to no longer allow that to go unabated, but to be willing and courageous, truly heroic enough to discover where you really are, what you really believe, what you really think, and what you really feel. Now, you can do the real work around those beliefs and feelings. You can do the shadow work. You can do the mindful meditation practice where you just sit with the feelings and observe them, but don’t become lost in them. That’s important. We’re not saying feel the feelings and become indulgent and get lost with them. We’re saying let it come to the surface, so you can shine the light of your awareness on it and transmute it and redeem it. Don’t indulge in it. You observe. You feel it, but you allow yourself to be the witness of the feeling the same with the beliefs. Then, you specifically create affirmations or vision, visualization that represents the opposite, or the truth versus your limited belief. You continue to work with the limited belief to redeem and transmute the energy of it.

Do the shadow work through values conflict work, etc. You start to then notice when you start to do certain compulsive behaviors, like eating when you’re not hungry, eating more than you really need, working so much and never taking a break, and never giving yourself a break. You just start to notice, when do I start to feel constricted, when do I start to do things that are not fully serving or honoring me or others. Let me stop and let me question what’s really going on there. What am I really feeling? You’ll always discover there’s some kind of emotion there. What am I really believing? Well, I can’t just stop or slow down or take a break. It’s scary sometimes to stop and not eat that thing or not keep working on that thing or not keep doing all the stuff we’re doing, exercising, overexercising, overshopping, over whatever, overeating, overworking. It’s scary to stop, because there’s like this deep sense of void or a darkness or a fear or emptiness that we have to confront. We’ve been working so hard to not, and it does feel counterintuitive. It does feel almost destructive, almost just wrong to stop and let ourselves feel how terrible we feel. We have to override that temptation to avoid it. That’s the real path of awakening and mastery. At the same time, we don’t want to become indulgent in the content of our consciousness, so we have to also be simultaneously praying that prayer and saying that intention and doing the work to know the Truth. We’ve been talking about the truth with the little t, but we want to know the truth with the capital T. So we want to become really aware of the letter of truth, truth principles. That way we start to have a compass or a barometer to measure our beliefs against, so that when we come up against the belief that says, well, you’re such and such an age, at this point, things start going downhill mentally, physically, creatively, whatever. You can go, that feels true, and I certainly have a lot of people in society that will back me up in

At the same time, we don’t want to become indulgent in the content of our consciousness, so we have to also be simultaneously praying that prayer and saying that intention and doing the work to know the Truth. We’ve been talking about the truth with the little t, but we want to know the truth with the capital T. So we want to become really aware of the letter of truth, truth principles. That way we start to have a compass or a barometer to measure our beliefs against, so that when we come up against the belief that says, well, you’re such and such an age, at this point, things start going downhill mentally, physically, creatively, whatever. You can go, that feels true, and I certainly have a lot of people in society that will back me up in medical industry and whatever, but is it true? Let me go and look at the truth principle. Let me see if I can find anywhere in principle where this is true.

If you don’t know what the truth principles are, then that shows you where you need to do research, where you need to ask questions and investigate. What is the spiritual principle and truth about the body? Well, if the divine intelligence made everything out of itself, and its nature is infinite and omniscient and omnipotent and omnipresent, there can’t be anything outside of God. There can’t be any other substance or power or creative principle. God is all that there really is. God made all that is. In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and God made all that was made out of the Word, and nothing was made without the Word, and God saw it all and named it good, or as the Course In Miracles says, Nothing real can be damaged, nothing unreal exists. Okay, so then God made the body, because if God didn’t make it, it was never made. So this divine intelligence must have made it, and if divine infinite, omnipotent, omniscient, eternal, immortal intelligence made something, then its nature must be infinite, immortal, and eternal as well. This body must be as eternal and immortal and infinite as God. Oh, yeah, it says that the body is the temple of the living spirit. Okay, so then this belief that says at this age, it should start diminishing is just a belief. It’s not in principle at all.

So, do you see what I’m doing? I’m working through it to see where have I bought in to something that’s not true, but I might have to go study the letter of truth to discover what is principle there. The same thing with finances and abundance. Again, the same principle, if the nature of it is infinite, immortal and eternal, then my dollar bills in my bank or the lack thereof isn’t telling me how much abundance I have. If I’m a unique expression of this one life, then my capacity must be the same as God’s capacity. I must have infinite supply, infinite abundance. If this is only God expressing, the one appearing as the many, like the one tree with its many branches, then if Bill Gates or Oprah or anybody else could have a lot of abundance, then the same abundance must be right where I am, uniquely expressing as this branch on the tree.

You just start to play with the truth principles and compare them against your belief systems, and you start to call it for what it really is. Then, once you really know the truth principle, you can look at these beliefs and say, if they’re telling you anything less than that you are infinite, immortal, eternal, whole, complete, perfect, fulfilled, free, fully-expressed, beautiful, bountiful, abundant, bold, powerful, brilliant expression of life, love, peace, joy, health, and abundant, if these beliefs are telling you anything less than that, they’re a lie. You can look into that and say, you’re a liar, and the father of even more lies. You can’t do that if you’re not consciously excavating them, and you’re not consciously seeking to know the truth principles. This must become a part of your practice. You must become contemplative and have the courage. This is real heroism. Certainly it’s heroic to go on the battlefield and to run into a burning building, but this is the ultimate heroism.

So, I invite you on this path of becoming a hero in your own life and in your own work to begin to ask – Where am I really? What do I really believe? What do I really feel? Understand that you cannot get to where you really want to go, to where you’re destined to go unless you’re honest with where you really are. So, I hope that serves you, inspires you, opened you up, and now you have to do the work. It’s the work play.

(Bonus Episode) ASK DEREK – How Do You Deal With the Haters (The Gift of Criticism)

(Bonus Episode) ASK DEREK – How Do You Deal With the Haters (The Gift of Criticism)

This is an issue that has always been part of human culture, but with the ability of so many people to comment anonymously online, our need to deal with criticism and the haters has been greatly magnified.

There’s a thing in the UK called ‘Tall Poppy Syndrome,’ which is based on the need to cut off the top of a poppy if it grows above the rest — to create uniformity. But it also applies to people — if someone gets too big and rises above the rest, there is an impulse to cut them down. When people start to outgrow the tribe, then members of the tribe seek to pull them back down so that they can feel safe and secure.

The key thing to remember from the standpoint of Emergence is that everything, without exception, is there to serve you. You are creating your own Universe, and so everything, if you’re willing to practice this way and to live in this framework, is there to serve your awakening, empowerment, and evolution — to make you an ever stronger instrument of what you’re here to do, be and share.

You’ve got to start there. Everything is here to serve me. So the question doesn’t become, “Why is this happening to me?” , but, “How is this serving me?” “How is this making me stronger?”, “How is this activating something in me, and what is the greater potential it’s activating in me?”

Whenever somebody is criticizing you, especially when it’s truly unfair, unjust or unfounded, there is a very powerful opportunity for you to become more anchored in your truth. It’s the opportunity to build that inner soul stamina, that inner muscle of knowing who you are, and of valuing yourself — which ultimately will inoculate you from the limited thought viruses of the world.

If you understand the shadow work, anything that pushes or pulls you is a projection of your unintegrated potential or power. That works both ways — anything that is pushing your buttons, which are the haters or the criticisms, is really an unconscious judgment you have about a part of yourself.

When you are criticized and it’s making you feel like you need to fight for your right or defend your perspective, and convince them that it’s not true, it’s because there’s a part of you that actually believes it. (It’s also possible that there’s a part of you that actually does have that element to some degree.) To become truly free and empowered requires you to look at this part, understand, embrace, and integrate it.

For example, somebody calls you selfish, and you might respond, “I’m not selfish! I’m one of the most giving people I know. I’m always helping you. I’m always doing this for you.” You find yourself going through a list of all the ways you’re such a giving selfless person. This is just defense, resistance, and actually anchors the shame and judgment even deeper.

Instead, you want to stop and contemplate if there is any truth to it – “Let me see where in my life am I selfish.”This immediately starts to diffuse the criticism, especially if you do it in front of a someone whose criticized you, instead of defending yourself. You actually start to look for where you’re selfish, and you’ll find something. If you don’t find the way you are overtly selfish to others, then you want to look internally and see where you’re selfish with yourself. You’re not doing this to beat yourself up, but because it’s showing up in your life as feedback. Don’t just dismiss it.

The next thing you look at is the particular judgment, the shadow, and see where you might have some baggage around it. For example, let’s say you’re becoming successful, getting in shape, or growing in some positive way, and some people tell you, “Oh, you’re so greedy. You’re so self-important.” If you’re a spiritual teacher or artist, you might hear things like, “How could you try to make money off spirituality or art? That’s so unspiritual…art, music, information — these should all openly available to everyone. You should be charging much less or giving it away for free!”

To key is to see where you harbor judgments, fears, beliefs of limitations around this area. It’s showing up as criticism so you can clear it and embody the truth of it — that means, first, seeing where you might be out of integrity, and second, seeing where you have unconscious limiting beliefs, shadows or values conflicts that are sabotaging your ability to really grow or succeed in this area. It’s like the beginning of a weed that’s going to eventually grow up and choke the plant. This might be a blessing in disguise.

By being willing to examine your judgments and shadows you begin to clean up your side of the street and become even more in integrity, more in alignment with who or what you really are. As you ask yourself, “How is this here to truly serve my greater purpose and potential?”, you will begin to tap into a vision for your life where you start to see that this is showing up to make you stronger and more resilient. You begin to access and activate latent powers, gifts, talents and abilities.

That’s the gift of criticism. And what an awesome gift it is!

To support you in mastering this, listen to the in-depth podcast on the subject, where we break it down and put it into real-life practice TODAY. This will be a real game-changer.

To Your Emergence!

Stay inspired!

Derek

Other powerful free trainings in the podcast library:

Where are You REALLY?
When to Stay the Course, When to Change Directions
Why ALL Your Beliefs Limit You (And What You Should Do Instead)

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Full Transcript
[The following is the full transcript of this episode of the Emergence, A Revolutionary Path for Radical Life Change, with Derek Rydall Podcast]

Welcome to another episode of Ask Derek on this journey of Emergence, where we deal with the question today How do you deal with the haters? Otherwise known as the gift of criticism. This is something that is always been a part of culture, people that criticize people, that hate on people, that try to cut people down. In the UK, there’s a saying for the tall poppy syndrome. If a poppy gets too big above the rest, it gets lopped off at the head. When people get too big amongst the tribe, then the rest of the individuals on some levels seek to pull them back down to match everybody else. They’re such a general kind of thing that one ego likes to bring another ego down and ultimately be at the very least equal and ideally less than, or if you’ve been wounded then actually you bring yourself down, but that’s a whole other topic. Nowadays, with internet and with so much public expression of ourselves and so much public exposure and so many people online that can comment anonymously, this problem of dealing with criticism and the haters, also called the trolls, is just much, much bigger, and I would submit that it’s not that the problem itself or the issue itself has changed, it’s just that it becomes magnified, but it’s always been in the human psyche.

The key thing to remember from the standpoint of Emergence and this work is that everything, without exception, is there to serve you. You are creating your own Universe, and so everything, without exception, if you’re willing to practice this way and to live in this framework, is there to serve your awakening, your empowering, your evolution to make you an ever stronger, pure instrument of what you’re really here to do and to be and the gifts you’re here to give. You’ve got to start there. You’ve got to always come back to there. Everything is here to serve me. So the question doesn’t become, why is this happening to me, but how is this serving me? How is this making me stronger? How is this activating something in me, and what is the greater potential it’s activating in me? Whenever somebody is hating on you, is criticizing you, especially when it’s truly unfair or unjust or unfounded, then there is a very powerful opportunity for you to become really anchored in the truth of who and what you really are and build that inner soul stamina, that inner muscle of knowing who you are, of valuing yourself, of not being inoculated or immune to the feedback and the criticisms of the world.

There’s another side topic to this, which I won’t go into today, but it’s important to know that ultimately you want to become free of all opinions, good ones and the bad ones. So even those that are praising you, you ultimately want to become free of those too. For one thing, much praise is really a projection. If you understand the shadow work, anything that pushes or pulls you is a projection of your unintegrated potential or power. That works both ways, so anything that is pushing your buttons, which are the haters or the criticisms, is really an unconscious judgment you have about a part of yourself. We’ll talk about that in a moment. Anything that pulls you, those people you greatly admire, those people you find yourself praising, is really also a projection of an unintegrated, unidentified part of your own power. When other people are praising you, often, they’re projecting their disowned power. That’s why, especially if you’re in some role of leadership, authority, expert, teacher, etc. and that begins to happen, or healer, or therapist, at some point, projection happens, or otherwise, it’s been called transference. They start to either reject you or praise you, criticize you or praise. Both are equally false. Both are equally their projection. When it’s criticism, your job is to not defend and fight and prove your point, but to look within yourself and find that part of yourself where you hold that criticism, where you have that shadow. When it’s praise, your job is to notice your own proclivity, the one that grabbed on to that.

Now, that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t receive the love and the compliments. Let it in. Let all the love in, but if you’re in authority position, you want to give it back to them. You don’t want people to become followers. You want to empower them to become their own leaders. When they start projecting their power on you, you want to not so much reject their compliment, accept it, but also remind them that whatever good they see in you, especially where they feel incredibly praiseworthy, is really a reflection of good that’s within them, that they perhaps have not fully owned, and that this is an opportunity to own it. So, the entire star system, celebrity, athletes, all of that, is made of that. It’s made up of a projection of our disowned power. Praise and criticism are equally projections, and ultimately we want to become free of both of them.

We’re talking about the haters today. We’re talking about the gift of criticism, and so we come back to the shadow again and understand that if anybody is criticizing you or hating on you, and it’s making you feel like you need to fight for your right, you need to defend your prospective, you need to set them straight, you need to convince them that it’s not true or convince other people that it’s not true, it’s because there’s a part of you that actually believes it. It’s also possible that there’s a part of you that actually does have that element to some degree. For example, somebody calls you selfish, and you might go, I’m not selfish. I’m one of the most giving people I know. I’m always helping you. I’m always doing this for you. You find yourself going through a list of all the ways you’re such a giving selfless person. The first thing you want to do is stop and go, Let me take that feedback in and let me see is there any truth to it. Criticism is never True. It’s not ultimate truth, but you want to look and see Is there any truth to it? Let me see where in my life am I selfish.

First of all, this immediately starts to diffuse the criticism, especially if you do it in person in front of them, instead of defending yourself. You actually start to look for where you’re selfish, and you’ll find something. If you don’t find the way you are overtly selfish to others, then you want to look internally and see where am I selfish with myself? When somebody says you’re greedy, and you’re like one of the most generous people you know, where am I greedy? You look, and you’ll find something. That’s the first step. Find out where there’s some truth to it, not to beat yourself up, but because it’s showing up in your life as feedback. Don’t just dismiss it. Of course, sometimes, feedback is not simply you’re being selfish. It’s things like, you’re a complete waste of humanity. You’re a waste of human space, and in that case, it’s going to be hard to go, Where am I a waste of human space? Now, you might find something as the old axiom goes, If you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much space. You might actually go, Well, I do waste time just surfing the internet. I gossip with my friends sometimes, just meaningless gossip that adds no value to anybody’s life. You know what, that is a waste of human space. That is a waste of time. In that moment, I am wasting my life and their life. That might be valuable to discover that, to clean that up.

The next thing you look at is, Okay, let me look at that particular judgment, that shadow, and see where I might have some baggage around that. For example, let’s say you are becoming successful or you’re endeavoring to be successful and make more money in your life, and some people come out and tell you, Oh, you’re so greedy. You’re so self-important. If you’re a consciousness or spiritual teacher or thought leader, you’ll get the kind of criticisms of how could you try to make money off spirituality. That’s so unspiritual. That’s so unconscious. That’s so mean or insensitive. You should be charging much, much less or giving it away for free, etc. If you are really a spiritual teacher, you wouldn’t charge anything. That’s a very big thing of baggage in this arena. You can go and look at that and see where do you hold some personal judgments about people that make a lot of money, or people that make money with spirituality, or people that are really successful. You can begin to see how you also harbor some udgments around that, some fears around that, some beliefs of limitation around that. They’re showing up so that you can clean it out, so that you can first of all see where you might be out of integrity, and second of all see where you have unconscious limiting beliefs or shadows or values conflicts that are sabotaging your ability to really grow or to really succeed or they will. It’s like the beginning of a weed that’s going to eventually grow up and choke the plant. This might be a blessing in disguise. This is a gift of criticism.

You can begin to clean up your side of the street and become even more in integrity, more in alignment with who or what you really are, and you can begin to access and activate latent powers, gifts, talents and abilities. I won’t go into the whole shadow process here, but you can certainly check out when I talk about shadow work or values conflict in other podcasts. You can go to DerekRydall.com/ShadowProcess and download a free audio process around the shadow. You can also grab the Shadow Dancing program if you really want to master shadow work. So, you first want to acknowledge where there might be some truth, so you can come back into greater integrity. You want to then acknowledge where you might have judgments and baggage around this particular part of you, so that you can begin to clean it up and activate that disowned power and capacity through the shadow work. Finally, as you ask how is this here to truly serve my greater purpose, my greater potential, you will begin to tap into a vision for your life where you start to see that this is showing up to make you stronger, more resilient, so that you can give your gifts and speak your truth, and share your work and your message, whether it’s in your family or in relationships or in the world, in bigger and bigger platforms and bigger and bigger ways where there will be even more potential for attack and criticism.

Let’s just say right now you’re just starting out, and perhaps your circle of influence is relatively small, and so there’s not a lot of people that are exposed you or your message or your work or your opinions, and it’s not challenging you that much. If you are to suddenly get a large global platform or suddenly be in front of a large audience or suddenly be exposed in some much grander way, a hundred times where you are right now, the amount of feedback, criticism, opinions would most likely just crush you, because you don’t have the inner fortitude or stamina or resilience or consciousness that’s been developed to handle that. When I was just walking around in high school, if anybody had an opinion about me, it took me out for a period of time. Now, I’m exposed to tens of thousands of people or more a year, and there’s plenty of opinion. It’s not that it doesn’t sometimes still bother me a little bit, but it’s mostly because I’m sad by the lack of compassion and the ignorance of other people when they are just haters. I don’t mind constructive criticism, and you shouldn’t either, when it’s just trolling, when it’s just hating, when it’s just venting and it has no value. My level of resilience and my ability to handle it is much, much stronger. Sometimes people are like, How do you deal with that? How do you handle that? hence this question – how do you deal with the haters? It’s because I’ve been practicing. I’ve been exercising my capacity to love myself, value myself, forgive myself and be humble enough to look at these places in me that aren’t in integrity and that do have judgments and baggage and shadows.

Have I completely cleaned myself out of all of this? Absolutely not. In fact, one of the things that inspired me to do this podcast and answer this question now is because in recent months, the last year or so, I’ve been growing through a period where in the realm of family and friends and social circles, I became a target for certain stories and beliefs and opinions and perceptions that in my opinion are not true, and in fact are blatantly false and could be extremely hurtful, and in fact have been hurtful a few times. I noticed for the first time in a long time, I felt the need to want to convince other people that these stories and things weren’t true, whereas in the larger world, I had become relatively inoculated. I don’t mean if I was to suddenly be on the global stage, in the global media, that I would be immune to that level of feedback, but I get enough feedback to see that I’m pretty strong in that area. What I discovered was that in my personal life, with family and friends and the larger circle, that I was not immune. Of course, that’s where it cuts the deepest, those closest to us. That’s the Divine purpose of those relationships. That’s why we are shadow dancing in those relationships. That’s why we created those soul contracts, so that they could show us where we’re unconscious, where we’re living in fear or separation, lack or limitation, where we don’t know who we really are, where we don’t deeply truly love and value ourselves and respect ourselves. They show up so that we can ultimately come home to ourselves. Because I know that, I’m working with it and have worked through a lot of it. It’s very important that you know that, that everybody that shows up is bearing a gift uniquely wrapped for you.

It’s like the grain of sand that gets into the oyster, that irritates the heck out of it, but the result is that it spins a pearl. To try to get rid of that irritation, it creates a beautiful pearl. So all these people that come into your life that are criticizing you and even hating on you and telling lies or distortions, those are the grains of sand getting in your shell. There you can create a string of pearls. As the Bible calls it, the pearl of great price. It’s that ultimate wisdom that comes from digging deeper, not taking life at face value, but taking everything that comes as a gift and a blessing, often in disguise, and doing this inner work. So that you can transform and transmute that into a pearl, into a jewel, into a treasure, and ultimately into real wisdom that not only adds value to your life but allows you to turn around and add value to the lives of others and to become a role model in whatever area that you endeavor, family, friends, business, the world.

So, my invitation to you is when this shows up in your life – the opinion, the feedback, the criticism, the haters, family, friends, business, and colleagues or beyond – that you stop, and you remember everything is conspiring for your good, for your growth, for your evolution. This is showing up to make you stronger. Then ask what if anything is true about this? I’m willing to see where am I in this so I can take responsibility for it and clean it up. Number two, where is the shadow? What’s the shadow here? If somebody’s calling you a name – you’re a loser, you’re cheap, you’re selfish – whatever, you want to go and do the shadow work on that until you can fully own and embrace that part of you. Number three, you want to ask, how is this serving my larger vision? How is it making me a unique and perfect instrument to serve the larger purpose, to share the larger message? You’ll start to discover as you work with that that it is making you stronger so that you can share your message, speak your truth on a much bigger platform where more people might criticize you or have their opinions, but you will be immune to that because you’ve done the work today rather than waiting until then.

It’s like the story of a surfer that goes from beach to beach waiting for the big wave, but never gets out there and surfs the little ones. When the big wave finally comes, the surfer gets out there and gets just crushed by the wave, because they haven’t built the musculature, the dexterity, the ability to handle that velocity, that energy. They’re just not ready for it, and so it destroys them. If it doesn’t kill them, it might tremendously set them back in terms of their interest and desire and belief that they can never do it again. So, you want to practice every little time there’s a criticism, there’s a judgment, there’s an opinion that pushes your buttons. That’s the time to do the work. It’s like the old saying that every little challenge is a practice for dying. Those challenges that you have to surrender and open up beyond your self-concept is practice for dying, which is the ultimate surrender of your self-concept. That’s all dying really is, you’re releasing your material, personal self-concepts, but who you really are never dies. It continues to emerge and unfold. These criticisms are like little deaths. They’re opportunities for you to let go of a little part of your ego that’s fighting for its right, trying to prove itself, trying to survive. You can breathe and release that and get the gift of that criticism.

One little caveat to all these, and I think it’s very important, because a lot of people, they’re heart-centered, spiritually-minded, they are wounded, they are scarred, they are scared, and sometimes what’s really necessary needed is for people to take a stand for themselves, to so value and respect and love themselves that they have the courage and the willingness to tell other people that are mistreating them, that is not okay. You don’t get to do that. You don’t get to talk to me that way. You don’t get to treat me that way. I’m putting my foot down. Come what may. You can reject me. You can fire me. You can kick me out of the house, whatever the case may be, but I will not allow anybody to treat me less than kind and respectful. That’s a very valid stance. It’s a very valid and important step and stage for a person’s development, but if you find yourself always doing that, and doing that and trying to convince a person to see you a certain way, that’s where you know you’ve gotten caught up in your own shadow. You’re trying to use them as a proxy to try to quell your own bad feelings. Do you understand what I mean? If I can just get them to see me a certain way, I’ll feel better, but it never works, because your feeling bad really isn’t about them. They’ve triggered a pocket in you that already has that judgment. So, whenever you are drawing a boundary, this is very important, you’re not doing it to change them. You’re not putting up a boundary to change their behavior. You’re putting up a boundary to honor yourself, to stand in your truth and in your power.

If I said to a person, You don’t get to talk to me that way. If you want to be around me, you’re going to have to treat me more respectful, more kind, etc. I’m not saying you’ve got to change or else. It’s not an ultimatum. Maybe it’s an ultimatum, but I’m not trying to manipulate them. I could even say to them, I’m not telling you you need to be different for your own life, but if you’re going to be in my life, this is where my line is. You see? Then, it’s up to them to change or to choose to change, but you’re not trying to change them. You’re not trying to change them to make you feel better. You’re taking a stance. You’re putting a boundary up. You are loving and valuing and respecting and honoring yourself for its own sake. If they continue to act out, to criticize, to hate on you, to do whatever they’re doing, then you take whatever the next logical step is. You break off relations. There’s a certain consequence. Again, not because you’re trying to change them, but because you’re going to stand in the truth of honoring, valuing, loving, and respecting yourself. Whatever they decide to do around that is ultimately up to them, but it’s an important thing to add to this, because otherwise some people might hear that I’m saying if somebody’s hating on you and saying mean and rude things to you and disrespecting you, don’t say anything to them, don’t do anything about it, just go work on yourself. I’m not saying that. I am saying that wherever it pushes your buttons and makes you feel compelled through a more compulsive behavior to want to change their opinion in order to feel better, that is about you.

You want to work on yourself, so that you don’t have the button, but you also get to have boundaries. You’ve got to treat yourself with love and kindness and respect. Let others know that nothing less than that is acceptable. Now, of course, this comes with a price, because the minute you take a stand to love, value, and respect yourself and make that a boundary, they’re going to call you out on all the places where you are not loving, kind, or respectful to them, or in general. So you’re going to have to take responsibility for that. That’s a step that you have to take sometimes in order to get to the next level. You have to be willing, again, to be humble, to be open, to really listen and to look and see where within me is what they’re saying true? So, this isn’t just one side. Sometimes it’s not a monologue. Sometimes it requires a dialogue, okay? Ultimately, your goal, your focus, your intention is about you cleaning up you, you becoming an integrity, you being cleared of who and what you really are and why you’re alive and knowing your true value and power and coming into a greater sense of self-love, self-respect, and self-actualization. It’s not about changing the world. That’s the key idea here that I want you to get in all of this, okay? That’s how you deal with the haters. That’s the gift of criticism. If you’re willing to take this stand and commit to this path, everybody that comes at you, even though they may think they’re throwing a grain of sand into your shell, you will be able to turn that into a pearl.

By the way, this is also the esoteric meaning of turn the other cheek. It doesn’t mean just letting a person keep hitting you. It means to return a different energy than what you receive. That’s ultimately what you’re able to do. You’re able to take in the hate, the criticism, and transmute it through your consciousness to love and light and power. Think about that. Think about that. It’s like a plant that takes in carbon dioxide and turns it into oxygen. Certain fish and certain sea products, they take in wastes, and they turn it into something of value. That’s what you become – an individual that takes all of that negativity and redeems it and transmute it back into power and intelligence, and wisdom, and light, and ultimately love. That’s pretty cool. I think that’s a beautiful place to end. That’s my charge to you. I hope you’ve enjoyed this edition of Ask Derek as part of my Emergence podcasts. If you want to go deeper in this work, please go to DerekRydall.com. Go to the free resource section. Download all the free tools and trainings. If you have not yet gotten a copy of my best-selling book Emergence, you can go to GetEmergenceBook.com and grab your copy there, and all the bonuses that come with that. If you have not yet registered for this podcast in iTunes, please take a moment. It just takes a moment, it’s literally a click of the button to register on iTunes for the Emergence podcast. Leave a review, because it really does help more people receive this. If you found this to be valuable, please share it with a friend or two. I look forward to connecting with you more personally and to giving you even more cutting edge or emerging edge, knowledge and inspiration and transformation. Until next time, remember to live authentically, love unconditionally, and follow your destiny.

(Bonus Episode) The Mighty Mo: How to Create Real Momentum

(Bonus Episode) The Mighty Mo: How to Create Real Momentum

The biggest challenges for many of us is either getting and keeping momentum, or having momentum, but it going the opposite direction – downward momentum.

For the latter, it’s like having one foot on the gas and one foot on the brake. We have a downward pull, and then we’re simultaneously having upward pull. If you’re driving and pushing to make stuff happen in your life, it’s because you’ve got momentum going in two directions.

The worst thing that we try to do when we’re pushing and pushing is to push more, or push harder, at least in same the way that we’ve been pushing.

We must notice where is the momentum going in the opposite direction. This is one of the deeper esoteric meanings of the Biblical statement, “Where two or more are gathered in agreement, there I am in the midst of them.” The two or more can certainly be two or more people as in a church, organization, spiritual organization, but it also represents the two or more aspects of ourselves – the conscious, the unconscious, the mental, emotional, physical. When all of those are in agreement, moving in the same direction, then you activate the larger pattern of your potential, and you have real momentum.

This is also one of the meanings behind the Biblical statement that you cannot serve two masters, or you will be a house divided and a house divided cannot stand. A lot of times, when we’re feeling stuck and we’re lacking real momentum, it’s because we’re trying to serve two masters. We are ambitious. We are, on one hand, going for something and then the other hand not believing it’s going to happen or not believing that we’re worthy, or whatever the case may be. We can’t get real momentum.

As the core of the Emergence work, we want to ultimately bring all of our life into congruence, into integrity with our biggest vision – all going in the same direction. That’s what develops the optimal level of momentum.

As we hit new levels of growth and unfoldment, we hit new thresholds. Those unconscious limited beliefs, or just those areas that need to be activated more fully, they come up, and they create these road blocks that slow us down. We have to look at them, whether it’s a shadow, a values conflict or just developing ourselves.

One of the biggest of misunderstandings and things we tell ourselves is “I’m stuck.” We believe that we actually can be stuck. The truth is you can never really be stuck, no matter what the situation is. Even if you’re literally bedridden right now – there’s four core areas where you can get momentum. They are mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. (We could even say energetically, because you can actually separate out the energetics of it.)

If one of those areas is difficult or closed off at the moment, like being bedridden, you could sit and visualize and imagine yourself playing your sport and repeating it over and over, just getting it down to the most minute detail until you are just playing basketball masterfully. You see every little move of your hand. You can watch the best highlights of the golf swing and then imagine yourself doing it. Believe it or not, you are developing that skill mentally and emotionally, and creating real momentum.

This is true in any area. By practicing your talents, your gifts, your skills, at any level and any moment, there’s always a next step that you can do mentally and emotionally. There’s always something you can do to move forward.

The way you keep taking your life to higher levels is you have to habituate whatever level you’re working towards, so that that becomes a subconscious subjective pattern or habit. When you’re thinking about building momentum, it’s not just about going from zero to 60 quickly. Sometimes that’s necessary, but it’s more about developing the habits, to ultimately put momentum on autopilot.

Habit is ultimately what determines your character, and your character is what determines your destiny. Especially if you’re going, what seems to be going backwards, it requires patience as you’re building these new habits, because at first it might appear like you’re not getting any momentum.

If you try to move a big giant ship that is going in one direction, you turn it, you won’t see it turning right away – it takes time.

You can’t always judge by appearances where there’s real progress. If you’re building these habits based on your highest vision and based on the character you want to develop, then you are on the right track. It doesn’t have to be this grand high faluting vision. It’s just whatever that thing is you most feel and inspired to move towards.

You’re designing a way of life that allows you to mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually, and energetically start moving everything towards that direction.

At the most simplest level, how you get the Mighty Mo is to start moving… Move yourself emotionally, move yourself mentally, move yourself spiritually, and move yourself physically – you can always move no matter what, no matter who you are.

To support you in mastering this, listen to the in-depth podcast on the subject, where we break it down and put it into real-life practice TODAY. This will be a real game-changer.

To Your Emergence!

Stay inspired!

Derek

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Where are You REALLY?
When to Stay the Course, When to Change Directions
Why ALL Your Beliefs Limit You (And What You Should Do Instead)

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Full Transcript
[The following is the full transcript of this episode of the Emergence, A Revolutionary Path for Radical Life Change, with Derek Rydall Podcast]

Greetings, my fellow Emergineers. Derek Rydall here, and it’s so good to be with you again as we’re talking about the Mighty Mo, how to create real momentum in your life, even if your life is standing still or it’s going backwards. This is such an important aspect. The Mighty Mo obviously stands for momentum. Mighty Mo, Uncle Mo – it’s all about momentum. For so many of us, and of you, one of the biggest challenges is getting and keeping momentum. Ultimately, the reason why we don’t create momentum is a variety of things. We’re going to talk about that. A lot of us do have momentum, it’s just we have momentum that’s going either in the opposite direction, it’s downward momentum, or we have dual momentum. It’s like we have one foot on the gas and one foot on the brake. We have a downward pull, and then we’re simultaneously having upward pull. If you’re driving and pushing to make stuff happen in your life, it’s because you’ve got momentum going in two directions.

This is called ambition. Ambition means you’re going in two directions at the same time. It’s like the Zen statement of trying to ride two horses at the same time that are going in different directions. When you’re pushing and struggling, oftentimes it’s because on one hand, you’ve got momentum going down or going backwards, or, for example, you’ve got an emotional or mental momentum in the direction of It’s not going to happen. It’s not going to happen. It’s not going to work. Then, you are physically pushing and maybe mentally on some level also pushing, I’ve got to make it work. I’ve got to make it work. I’vegot to make it work. Again, it’s like running in place. It’s like running on a treadmill, or worse, having one foot on the brake and one foot on the gas. This is what creates burnout and ultimately overwhelm and breakdown.

The worst thing that we try to do when we’re pushing and pushing and pushing is just push more, just push harder, at least in the way that we’ve been pushing. It doesn’t mean we don’t want to keep working, but we don’t want to keep working or pushing in the way we have been. We want to notice where is the momentum going in the opposite direction, and how can we get all of us going in the same direction? This is one of the deeper esoteric meanings of the Biblical statement, Where two or more are gathered in agreement, there I am in the midst of them. The two or more can certainly be two or more people as in a church, organization, spiritual organization, but it also represents the two or more aspects of ourselves – the conscious, the unconscious, the mental, emotional, physical. When all of those are in agreement, moving in the same direction, then you activate the larger pattern of your potential, and you have real momentum. This is also one of the meanings behind the Biblical statement that you cannot serve two masters, or you will be a house divided and a house divided cannot stand. So, a lot of times, when we’re feeling stuck and we’re lacking real momentum, it’s because we’re just trying to serve two masters. We are ambitious. We are on one hand going for something, and then the other hand not believing it’s going to happen, not believing that we’re worthy, or whatever the case may be. We can’t get real momentum. Now, we’re just pushing and pushing and forcing or alternatively, we give up.Ultimately, as the core of the Emergence work, we wanted to ultimately bring all of our life into congruence, into integrity with our biggest vision, all going in the same direction. That’s what develops the optimal level of momentum. We’re not going to build or do it consistently forever and perfectly forever as we’re continuing to grow and unfold. As we hit new levels of growth and unfoldment, we hit new thresholds. Those unconscious limited beliefs, or just those areas that need to be activated more

Ultimately, as the core of the Emergence work, we wanted to ultimately bring all of our life into congruence, into integrity with our biggest vision, all going in the same direction. That’s what develops the optimal level of momentum. We’re not going to build or do it consistently forever and perfectly forever as we’re continuing to grow and unfold. As we hit new levels of growth and unfoldment, we hit new thresholds. Those unconscious limited beliefs, or just those areas that need to be activated more fully, they come up, and they create these road blocks that slow us down, and we have to look at them, whether it’s a shadow or values conflict or just developing ourselves. One of the biggest of misunderstandings and things we tell ourselves is I’m stuck. We believe that we actually can be stuck. We slipped into feeling like a victim and either don’t do anything, spend our time getting momentum around how much Ben & Jerry’s, Chunky Monkey or New York Super Fudge Chunk we can eat. We get a lot of momentum with that spoon and not enough momentum in the area that really matters most to us.

The truth is you can never really be stuck, no matter what the situation is. Let’s just say physically you are impaired and you’re bedridden, and let’s say you’re an athlete, and you’re like, You don’t understand, Derek, I can’t get momentum in the area of my athletic growth, because I’m literally bedridden right now. That’s not true, because there’s three core areas, or really four, where you can get momentum. That is mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. We could even say energetically, because actually you can separate out the energetics of it. So, you can get momentum in all those areas. If one of those areas is difficult or closed off at the moment, like you’re bedridden, you could sit there and visualize and imagine yourself playing your sport and repeating it over and over and over and just getting it down to the most minute detail until you are just playing basketball masterfully, or whatever the thing may be, and you see every little move of your hand. You can be watching the best highlights of golf swing or whatever, and then imagine yourself doing it. Believe it or not, and I think you do believe it, you are developing that skill just mentally and emotionally, and creating real momentum.

In fact, they’ve done a study where they had three groups. One was practicing basketball, going out there and doing the drills. The other one was just visualizing themselves practicing, and the other group was visualizing and practicing. The one that was visualizing did just as good as the one that was just practicing their skill level and their growth. The one that visualized and practiced did better than both of them. The key is that they could just visualize practicing, and they were able to grow their skill level and be on par with those that were just physically practicing. This is true in the area. You might say, I don’t have the capacity to go…͟ It will be another example. Maybe you think something requires money to launch your business or something. In fact, it really doesn’t, but you could be visualizing it. You could be practicing your talents, your gifts, your skills. At any level at any moment, there’s always a next step that you can do mentally, emotionally. You could be working on your mental games that you are embodying the mental mindset for whatever it is the next stage of your life. You could be working on your emotional game so that you are emotionally resilient and activating the high quality positive emotions. You can be working on physically, meaning any of the physical attributes – walking, talking, creating, developing, and then energetically increasing your energy and energy flow in your body and radiating and expanding your energy field, and spiritually – prayer, meditation. There’s always something you can do to move forward.

deally, like I said at the start, you want to bring all of these in line with your highest vision, your deeper desire, so they’re all moving in the same direction. In some cases, some periods, one or more of them aren’t moving in the same direction, but if you get enough of them moving, it pulls the other one with you. When you are feeling stuck or stagnant or overwhelmed or burned out or doing a lot of pushing and forcing, as I said, you want to begin to identify where you are going in opposite directions. What do you really believe about this? What do you really feel about this? Likewise, if you’re just doing affirmations and meditation, but you’re not taking any physical action, that could be the missing piece to create real momentum. If you’re just sitting around affirming, I’m rich. I’m abundant. I’m successful. I’m a powerful coach, leader, teacher, author or whatever but you’re not actually writing every day or taking steps to get new clients or whatever the case may be, then you can feel and experience yourself being stuck. It’s what I called coming spiritually or affirmatively constipated, because you’re activating all this energy, but you’re not expressing it. So, if you do have the capability to be taking other actions in these other dimensions then you want to be doing that. You don’t want to be just affirming that you’re abundant. You want to be taking actions of an abundant person. You want to be generating emotions of an abundant person and having conversations like an abundant person. Little bit by little bit, you bring your whole life into integrity, into congruence.

The other thing about momentum is to understand ultimately you want to put momentum on autopilot. What this means is that understanding that what we mostly live by is habits. Most of our life is run by habits – mental, emotional, physical habits, even energetic patterns that had become habitual. So, you want to be aware of that. The way you keep taking your life to higher levels is you have to habituate whatever level you’re working towards, so that that becomes a subconscious subjective pattern or habit. When you’re thinking about building momentum, it’s not just about going from zero to 60 quickly. Sometimes that’s necessary as soon as you have to just come out of the gate fast and furious. It’s more about what are the habits, what are the daily habits? It might not look like you’re getting a lot of momentum if you’re just writing a hundred words a day. What happens is, over time, suddenly those hundreds add up, and it adds up literally to pages and pages. When you start to have a stack of pages in front of you, it affects your emotional and mental outlook on it. You start to develop a consciousness of having of abundance, of things that are happening. All these difference start to connect, and they create momentum. You may not see it right away.

Momentum is not always about being busy. In fact, oftentimes when you’re busy you don’t have real momentum. Busyness does not equal being productive, doing what matters most does. You somewhat had to sacrifice busyness for building habits, for doing the right thing, the most important thing, and doing it consistently even, and especially, when it’s not urgent – sitting and meditating every day, not only when you’re in a bad place. You don’t want to just have foxhole consciousness where you’re only going to pray and meditate when you’re in the foxhole and the bullets are wheezing over your head. You build the practice until meditation becomes a habit. You notice throughout the day it starts to have a transferring effect, and you start to think about and tap into, regularly, this prayer without ceasing. It starts to build momentum. You start going to the gym or walking around the block every day. At first, you don’t see any results and don’t feel like it’s making a difference, but it starts to build momentum. Habit is what we’re most after. More than we want just a quick fix or a quick results, we want to know that we’re designing a way of life through our habits that ultimately building our character. It’s like this is just the kind of person I am. I meditate every day. I work on my creativity every day. I exercise every day or multiple times a week. I spend this kind of time with family, friends, and loved ones on a regular basis. I put in X amount of time in building my business every day. This is just who I am. That becomes a habit and a way of life. As Confucius said, All men are the same, but it is their habits that separate them.

Habit is ultimately what determines your character, and your character is what determines your destiny. Especially if you’re going what seems to be going backwards, sometimes you have to be patient as you’re building these new habits, because at first it might appear like you’re not getting any momentum. If you try to move a big giant ship that is going in one direction, you turn it, and you don’t see it turning right away. It takes time. I’ve used the analogy of the racecar that’s sliding towards the wall. You turn the wheel the opposite way, turning it away from the wall towards the track, but it’s got momentum still and it slides towards the wall. You could be like, Oh, my God. It’s not working. It’s not working. Then, you turn the wheel. You look at the wall again, and the wheel turns back towards the wall, and you hit the wall. If you are willing to turn away from the wall, the problem, the place that you’re sliding towards, the momentum that you don’t want, this backwards momentum, and you keep your attention on the road and on the finish line and where you want to go, at some point, the wheels catch. The momentum in the opposite direction gets stopped, and you reverse course. There’s a period a lot of times when you’re going backwards, where it feels like you’re doing all this stuff and it’s still sliding towards the wall. I’m doing all this stuff, and I’m not losing any weight. I’m doing all this stuff, and I’m not getting any clients. I’m doing all this stuff, and I’m not feeling better, but then there’s an inflection point where all that you’ve done catches up and the tires catch, and you’re back on track again.

You have to be patient. You can’t always judge by appearances where there’s real progress. If you’re building these habits based on your highest vision, you’re building habits that are based on the character you want to develop, then you are on the right track. Does that mean you’ll never hit the wall? No. If you don’t do this, you’re almost certain to hit the wall. You’re taking your ideal vision of where you want to go. It doesn’t have to be this grand high faluting vision. It’s just whatever that thing is you most feel and inspired to move towards. You’re designing a way of life that allows you to mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually, and energetically start moving everything towards that direction. That does include your inner and your outer environment. Your outer environment helps to either create momentum or recharge momentum, to speed it up or to slow it down. If you’ve got relationships, activities and spaces that are cluttered or that are negative or that are not aligned with where you want to go, every time you see that picture or watch that program or listen to that music or talk to that person that it is energetically, emotionally going in a different direction, you are slowing your momentum down. You want to design a life inside and out that represents where you want to go and not where you’ve been or even necessarily where you are. You see that inspiring image or picture or token. You watch that inspiring program and listen to that inspiring audio. All of that develops momentum energetically, spiritually, emotionally and mentally. You have conversations with people that are inspiring, that speak life into you, that are living their own life and that begins to bring momentum.

You’re designing a way of life inside and out that is about where you want to go, not where you’ve been. That’s how you build a reality that supports momentum. You do the daily practices that build the kinds of habits that represent the kind of character that you would be if you were living your ideal destiny. Regardless of where you’ve been or what you’re experiencing, you build those habits. In those areas where you really don’t feel like you can take action, then you focus on another area. As I said, if you just are feeling emotionally you’re so out of line, then you focus on what can I do physically. If I’m not feeling happy, what would a happy person do? I’m not able to generate happiness internally, let me find a way to do something physically, and now you have physical momentum, and then you activate emotional momentum. When you’re in that emotionally high place, that’s the best time to do your affirmations and your practice. Now you activate mental momentum and spiritual momentum. You see? You don’t have to wait. You just find your entry point, the place you can begin to move, and you go there. You don’t go, Oh, affirmations aren’t doing it for me today. I guess I’m screwed. No. If that’s not working, what can you do? Maybe you put on the piece of music and you dance. Suddenly, you’re feeling inspired again. You’re feeling energized. Now, say your affirmations or if none of that is working, maybe again, if I say emotionally you’re not feeling inspired to do the work you want to do, what can you do? Maybe you listen to a song, you take some physical action. You go out in nature or you call out a friend or whatever, but there’s always some next step. You don’t give yourself the luxury of being stuck.

Sometimes, what you need to continue and to stay in momentum is to do nothing. Nothing isn’t really a nothing, it’s an active resting. Remember that sound without space is just noise. Sound with the proper spacing is music. Action without rest is chaos. Action with the proper rest becomes productivity, creativity. Resting and space, both physical, mental, and emotional space, is a key component to creating momentum and to sustaining momentum. One of my favorite sayings is, play until you need to rest; rest until you want to play again. So, it’s a balance. Sometimes when you’re not feeling momentum and you’re pushing and pushing, stopping and becoming still is the most important thing you can do to get back on track again. The key is that wherever you are right now, begin where you are. Find that area where is your entry point and begin to align it with your bigger vision, and then one by one bring the rest of your life into alignment with it.

Now, what are some of the other things that prevent momentum? What are some of the areas we get stuck in? One is waiting. You’re waiting for some conditions to be right. You’re waiting for some person to be different. You’re feeling like a victim of them or of the situation. You’re wondering why you’re stuck. Whatever you’re waiting for, you’re waiting with, and then you’re weighing it down. Life doesn’t happen to you, it happens through you. Whatever’s missing is what you’re not giving. When you’re waiting telling yourself, Well, I’ll do this when, or I’ll start this when, you’ve got to ask yourself, how can I start this now? I’ll start to do this or be this way when that person treats me this way or respects me more. Well, how can you start respecting yourself now? We don’t want to wait. Now, there is a Divine waiting in the sense that you’re doing the work, you’ve done the work, and you’re in that resting period again, which is a very conscious resting. If you find yourself saying, I can’t do this thing that I want to do. I can’t move towards it and create momentum until something outside of me changes or even something inside of me, like I use the example before Well, I can’t really feel happy today because I can’t say affirmations. They’re not working, and so I’m just going to wait until happiness in me. No, what can you do to generate that feeling, to make create momentum?

The other one, again, talking about emotions and feelings, is emotional reasoning. We say, Well, I just don’t feel like it. I want to write today, but I just don’t feel inspired, and then we don’t. We don’t write. I want to do this thing. I want to go exercise, but I just don’t feel like it. We’ve grown up being conditioned to believe that’s a logical reason not to do it. In fact, it’s not. It’s emotional reasoning. It’s a cognitive disorder, because your emotions don’t determine your actions. Your emotions don’t have any actual power over you, so you don’t want to let them determine your actions. You want to let your vision determine your actions, and then take the actions of a person who’s feeling the way you want to feel, and you’ll start to generate those feelings. Start to hold yourself the way a person holds. There’s been plenty of studies to show that our physiology, the way we use our physiology has a big part into how we feel emotionally. Right now, if you want to experience depression, you can do that. You can slump your shoulders, you can look down, you can slow your voice down, lower the register of it, and start to feel more depressed, or you can straighten your back and you can raise your voice a little bit and speed up a little bit and keep your gaze upward, and you start to feel better. That is where you took a depressed person and had them stand up on a table, back straight, head held high, looking up, say, Okay, now, tell me what you’re depressed about, and the person would have to lower their head and look down to access that information. If they didn’t let them, you said, You’ve got to keep your eyes up, keep your head up, keep your back straight. Now, tell me what you’re depressed about. They literally couldn’t access their depression. So, use your physiology, use your body, use that to create momentum.

Another thing that obviously stops momentum is our judgments, otherwise known as our shadows. We want to move in a particular direction, we’re hitting a threshold, and when we look and say, What am I afraid that’s going to happen if I do this? Oh, I’m going to fail, and then what would I make that mean about me or what would others think about me? You’re a loser, you’re a failure, you’re stupid, and so that’s why we’re not moving forward. So, you want to then stop, write that down and begin to address that very specifically and practically in shadow work. You don’t want to stop moving. You don’t want to go get that would be a good excuse for you to take a break for the next week and just do nothing but work on your shadow. You want to still take productive action in the direction of your vision. Now that you know there’s a judgment, there’s a shadow there, you’re not going to get caught in emotional reasoning and wait till you feel better about it, till you don’t feel afraid. You’re still going to take that action, but you’re also now going to work on the shadow which is equivalent to taking your foot off the brake. So, you still have your foot on the gas, but you’re now going to ease your foot off the brake by doing the shadow work.

The same thing is true with values conflicts. That’s where you want two different things, but they seem opposed to each other. You want space and freedom, and you want success and abundance. In your mind, they’ve been wired where in order to get success and abundance, you have to sacrifice space and freedom or time and freedom. In order to have time and freedom, you have to sacrifice success and abundance. You’re upbringing your experiences, that’s how you’ve been conditioned to believe. Of course, it’s not true, but it’s the map you’ve created. It’s the way your neurology has been wired. You discover by when you’re feeling stuck, you can ask questions like, if I achieve this or get this or do that, I’m afraid I’ll lose _____ or I’m afraid I’ll have to sacrifice _____. Do that question and answer period 5 or 10 times till you come up with a variety of things and start to see the pattern.I’m afraid if I really go for this, I’m going to have not enough time for myself. If I really go for this, it can take me away from family.

That’s a values conflict, and then you need to create a values affirmation, which is the more I do this or go for this, the more of this other thing I have, too. The more of this other thing I have and honor, the more of this other thing I go for. For example, the more successful and abundant I am in the world, the more time and freedom I have. The more I honor my legitimate need for time and freedom, the more inspired and empowered I am to create incredible success and abundance in the world. That becomes like a mantra, a values affirmation that rewires that, and so you begin to use that on a regular basis. You keep moving in the direction that your vision is calling. Again, you don’t wait to get the values affirmation all worked out, but now that becomes part of your daily practice while you’re also taking action.

This is why I created what I called the quantum plan. It’s not just outer action, outer action, outer action. It’s a plan that incorporates the objective and subjective parts of your brain of your awareness. You are developing and refining your daily practice in terms of building your inner life and the inner structures so that your inner life is moving in the same direction as your outer life. You’re working on both streams not one or the other and not one at the expense of the other. You don’t just stop outer actions to only work on inner actions. You don’t just stop inner action to only work on outer action which happens, right? We get so busy, we stop doing our daily practice. We lose momentum emotionally and spiritually, and then we wonder why the other action starts to lose momentum, and we start to feel tired or burned out or stressed or unclear. We focused all of our attention on the inner action, and once we hit a threshold, we stop the outer action, and then we wonder why we lose momentum and start to feel congested, constipated, sluggish, depressed. I’m doing all this meditation, prayer, affirmation, I’m depressed – because you’re not taking action. You’re not expressing it. You’re not circulating it. You’ve let go the outer for the inner or you let go of the inner for the outer. You become stressed, overwhelmed, burned out when you let go the outer for the inner. You become depressed, sluggish. So, you want to have both streams going, and then you put that together as part of your quantum plan so you’ve got a daily inner practice and a daily outer practice. All of it is aligned with your biggest vision. As you bump into those thresholds, you look deeper, you see what it’s really all about. Is it am I waiting for something? Is it emotional reasoning? Is it judgment or shadow? Is it values conflict? I add that piece to my daily practice. I keep moving outside and I got momentum again.

This is how you get the Mighty Mo. At the most simple level, how do you get momentum? You start moving. That’s the most basic level. Just start moving. Again, that doesn’t mean just physically start moving. It means just start moving in some capacity. Move yourself emotionally. Move yourself mentally. Move yourself spiritually. Move yourself physically. Again, when I use physical, that doesn’t just mean like walking. It means speaking, moving your body, expressing yourself creatively, etc. but just start moving. If you are moving in one of those dimensions, look at the other dimensions and see are you moving there too? If not, start getting that moving. This is how you create real momentum and really no longer can ever be stuck again. It doesn’t mean you won’t have challenges, you won’t have setbacks, you won’t have problems, you won’t feel bad some days but it won’t stop you. You won’t feel like a victim of it. Even if you do feel like a victim of it, you’ll look at that, you’ll do something about it. You won’t just stop. Eventually, this all becomes subjective. It becomes habit. Your life becomes now automatically designed. It starts to automatically produce this momentum. That habit pattern now develops your character. You literally evolve, you literally change, you literally become different, and now you’ve changed your destiny.

hope this has served you. I hope this has inspired you to find greater momentum, to realize that you can always move no matter what, no matter who you are. Stephen Hawking can’t move his body at all, but he certainly doesn’t have a lack of momentum in his life. Helen Keller couldn’t see or hear or speak very well, but it didn’t stop her from having momentum in her life. Many people have lost everything, gone bankrupt, had great tragedies, but they found that entry point to create momentum in their life. Wherever you are now, you can create real momentum and increase momentum. I invite you to pick one or two things you can do today to get momentum in some area where you felt otherwise stuck. Pick one or two things, and then share that in the Facebook group where you’re going to generate more momentum. Share that with your accountability partner. If you don’t have one, that’s a great way to get momentum. Get an accountability partner. Just reach out to somebody in the group. You’ll be off to the races. Just take a moment and just drop down into this field of grace, this prayer field. At least throw ourselves wide open. There’s always something trying to emerge, always more life, more light, more love, more truth, more beauty, more abundance. We just open ourselves now and the silence of our soul, we set an intention. We’re willing. We’re ready to be ever greater instruments of life and all of its many qualities than ever before. We’re available to more good than we’ve ever experienced or imagined. We’re available to be used more powerfully, more completely than we’ve ever imagined. We’re willing despite all appearances, all conditions, all past. We’re willing to be used. We’re willing to fulfill our purpose. We’re willing to be of service. We’re willing to be bigger, better, stronger, more awake, aware, creative than we’ve ever imagined. We’re just engaging willingness. I’m willing. I’m ready. I’m able. Use me. Send me.

Just take a moment and just drop down into this field of grace, this prayer field. At least throw ourselves wide open. There’s always something trying to emerge, always more life, more light, more love, more truth, more beauty, more abundance. We just open ourselves now and the silence of our soul, we set an intention. We’re willing. We’re ready to be ever greater instruments of life and all of its many qualities than ever before. We’re available to more good than we’ve ever experienced or imagined. We’re available to be used more powerfully, more completely than we’ve ever imagined. We’re willing despite all appearances, all conditions, all past. We’re willing to be used. We’re willing to fulfill our purpose. We’re willing to be of service. We’re willing to be bigger, better, stronger, more awake, aware, creative than we’ve ever imagined. We’re just engaging willingness. I’m willing. I’m ready. I’m able. Use me. Send me.

n this openness, in this availability, the whole Universe rushes to this place called each and every one of us, because it’s always looking for willing instrument to put itself on display. We’re just so available now, so willing. If any thoughts popped up, like a fear that somehow this is going to cause this to go in the wrong direction, or that God or life is going to somehow want us to do something we don’t, or that we’re going to have to sacrifice, we just notice any of that resistance. We bless it, and we release it, and we say I’m willing. I’m willing. I’m willing. Use me, life. Use me, God. Send me. Take over. Take over my whole life that it may become a transparency for the will of god, for the highest pattern of good, that my life may reveal and reflect the true order and harmony and abundance and beauty of the Universe and help and liberate and inspire and set others free along with me.

Wherever I’ve got and seemingly stuck, wherever I’ve created an excuse for why I can’t, why I’m not able, I’m willing not to let that remove. I’m willing for my life to just be a pure open channel for the full power and presence and love and brilliance of the universe of God. Like a mighty river rushing downhill without a boulder inside, I’m willing, I’m ready. Thy will be done. Whatever I need to see, feel, sense, embrace, release, speak, or do to be a channel and an instrument in the place where life can fulfill itself, where my destiny of greatness can be fulfilled, I’m ready and I’m willing now. No holds barred. In this space now, this flow continues to unfold. It finds all the pockets that are seemingly blocked and it opens them. Wherever where hungry were fed, wherever where thirsty were quenched, this energy, this flow now moves through our entire mind, body, heart and life transforming and transmuting everything to serve its higher purpose that we may truly fulfill that great and grand reason for which we came. It’s happening now. Breathe and receive this. Allow it. Allow gratitude to well up and so it is. Amen.

(Bonus Episode) The Crisis of Incongruence – The Hidden Cause of Unhappiness

(Bonus Episode) The Crisis of Incongruence – The Hidden Cause of Unhappiness

In the principle of Emergence, we learn that life doesn’t happen to us, it happens through us. All of life is trying to express as us, but it can only do so according to our level of receptivity and alignment with it. Because of this we don’t experience life directly, we experience it through our perceptions or filters.

The bad news is that, even though life is totally on your side, you can only experience it to the extend that you’re on your own side. The good news is that there’s a divine destiny, an emerging impulse, always seeking to bring you into harmony with your true purpose — so that life can fulfill itself through you.

The challenge is that the same mechanism that allows us to manifest a more expansive life as we embody more expansive perceptions, also causes a more limited life when our beliefs are limited.
The reason is that this inner mechanism is always trying to make us congruent to the blueprint or the self-concept that we’ve accepted about ourselves or the world. It doesn’t know good or bad, right or wrong, it just knows what you believe deep down — and then it works 24/7 to bring your life into integrity with that belief system.

Like the principle of homeostasis, it’s always trying to bring us back to a state of balance or congruent. For example, if you have a self-concept that says, “I’m not good with money” or, “Money is hard”, when it comes to money, even if you do all the right things to make money, it will beat a path out your door as fast as possible. Why? Because this mechanism is trying to bring you back into congruence with that self-concept or blueprint.

This is the meaning of the saying, “To he or she who is right in mind, they can do all the wrong things and it will turn out right; but, to he or she who is wrong in mind, they can do all the right things, and it will turn out wrong.” Whatever your inner blueprint is, if you’re trying to do a bunch of actions that aren’t in integrity with it and you’re not changing the blueprint, your life is going to come back into alignment with it.

Even when you have what the world would call success, if you’re not happy and fulfilled it’s because, on some level, your outer life does t match your inner blueprint of true happiness. This can cause successful people to self sabotage, or become addicted to quell the pain and confusion of being so unhappy when everything says they should be overjoyed with their life.

The work we must do is to get clear about what our inner blueprint for success and happiness is, then either change it if it’s not constructive and supportive, or begin the process of bribing our whole life into congruence with it. This includes the people, places, activities, and objects we fill our life with — and the things we take out of our life.

You’ll never be truly satisfied or fulfilled if your blueprint doesn’t match, or isn’t increasingly coming into alignment with the grand blueprint.
“True joy and happiness comes from living on that emerging edge of ever-expanding, ever-evolving increase, and progress.”

The first step is to look at your own inner self-concept, your own inner blueprint and see if it is in alignment with your highest and greatest desires or if you have acquiesced to limiting conditioning.

Are you merely trying to change the outer world while remaining the same? Are you just trying to lose weight or make money or win friends and influence others, when internally you believe you’re not worthy, capable, or unable?

That’s like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic. The ship is going down no matter what you do externally. You need to plug the holes internally. You need to redesign your inner self-concept and blueprint.

When you do that, you don’t have to make it happen, you are making it welcome. Then the law of mind operates upon that newly-enhanced blueprint and brings your life into integrity or congruence with it.

To support you in mastering this, listen to the in-depth podcast on the subject, where we break it down and put it into real-life practice TODAY. This will be a real game-changer.

To Your Emergence!

Stay inspired!

Derek

Other powerful free trainings in the podcast library:

The Mighty Mo: How to Create Real Momentum
ASK DEREK-How Do You Deal With the Haters (The Gift of Criticism)
Where are You REALLY?

To get these trainings now or see more episodes available, CLICK HERE!

PS – Like this episode? Please share it! Want more advanced training? Join my Emergence Academy.

Full Transcript

[The following is the full transcript of this episode of the Emergence, A Revolutionary Path for Radical Life Change, with Derek Rydall Podcast]

Derek Rydall here, and welcome to Emergence, this powerful journey of discovering our true hidden potential and our Divine purpose, and creating a life that allows it to unfold naturally and even effortlessly. It’s great to be with you again, and we’re talking today about the crisis of incongruence, or the hidden cause of unhappiness. This is such a powerful concept, because you know that by now, ideally, that life doesn’t happen to you, it happens through you. All of life is pouring through and as you, or at least trying according to a Divine pattern. You don’t experience life directly. You experience your perception of life, or experience life through your filters. Think of it like a pasta maker. You put all this pasta in one end and what comes out the other end is based on the filter that’s there. This is how life is happening. It’s not happening to us. Never is there a life outside happening to us, although that is the illusion. It’s happening through us and as us. If we want something more different to come into our life, we have to let something more or different come out of us. This is the foundational principle behind Emergence.

The second foundational principle is that once we are clear what it is we really truly want to emerge in our life, or even more accurately what is trying to emerge in our life, because there is a Divine pattern and Divine idea, a real purpose and destiny. We now have to organize our life to be congruent with that, to be in alignment, to be in integrity with that, not just one and done, not just here and there. We have to literally design a way of life inside and out that is congruent with our Divine pattern or plan or purpose. A subset of that, or an aspect of that, to understand is that therefore there’s a mechanism in the mind that is always seeking to make us congruent. Here me now. It’s always seeking to make you congruent. It’s always seeking to make you congruent to the blueprint or the self-concept that you have accepted, that is a part of your consciousness, that is the fundamental blueprint or concept or self-concept that is active in your consciousness. This mechanism is always working. It’s always striving to make us congruent. Like the principle of homeostasis, it’s always trying to bring us back to a state of balance. This mechanism within you is always trying to make you congruent.

For example, if you see yourself as a wealthy person, that your blueprint includes I’m wealthy and wealth easily flows through me, to me, and around me, etc. If that’s your blueprint, whether because of upbringing, conditioning, societal ideas, concepts or just your own inner work, then you will sort and you will delete or distort. You will have a cognitive dissonance around anything that could make you poor or broke or not congruent with that. If a challenge arises, like a downturn in the economy, or your money gets embezzled, or something happened, this mechanism will automatically start to drive you and draw things to you – drive and draw experiences to bring you back into integrity, alignment or congruence with that blueprint of I am wealthy. Likewise, if you have a blueprint or self-concept that, I’m not good with money, that I come from a long line of people that aren’t good with money, my parents weren’t good with money, I’m not good with money, money is hard, there’s a shortage of it, there’s not enough of it to go around, so your blueprint and your self-concept is that I never have enough; I don’t know enough. When it comes to money, I’m not good enough. Then even if you do all the right things to make money, that money will be on the path out your doorway as fast as possible. Even if you’re given money, even if you win the lottery as we’ve seen many times. We will follow up with you in a year or two or three, and you’ll not only have lost all the money or spent it all, but probably be in even greater debt. Why? Because that’s same mechanism is working 24/7 to bring you back into congruence with that self-concept or blueprint.

TranscriptionIt’s the same thing if you come from a family of overeaters and people that are overweight, and you find yourself constantly dieting and dieting and trying all these things to lose weight, maybe lose it temporarily, or you never can get it off, or if you do get it off, you just find it comes back on. You probably heard the statement, Once a fat person always a fat person. Well, that’s not meant to be derogatory. You get the point, because the blueprint, the self-concept, that hasn’t been changed in a fundamental level. This mechanism is always going to be working to bring you back into congruence with that. That’s one of the reasons why we are on this yo-yo diets, or money goes up and down, or weight goes up and down, or opportunities go up and down. It’s because there’s this inner conflict where we consciously want more or better or different, but the self-concept or the blueprint is the same. That’s because we are primarily working on the surface level where you’re working on strategies and tactics and to-dos. We’re trying to change the world, while we internally, fundamentally remain the same. That’s also by the way why you may lose weight but feel uncomfortable as a thin person, if you still have this underlying blueprint of an overweight person. When you finally come back to being overweight, or you might get a lot of money, you actually feel nervous or uncomfortable with it and find as you’re spending it and it’s burning a hole in your pocket and that actually when you come back to not having money, there’s this strange sense of relief. I wouldn’t quite call it happiness, but, ironically, you tend to be unhappy or nervous or anxious or uncomfortable until your inner pattern matches that. This is why that saying says, He or she who is right in mind, they can do all the wrong things and it will turn out right; but, he or she who is wrong in mind, they can do all the right things, it will turn out wrong. Why? What that means is whatever your self-concept or blueprint is, if you’re trying to do a bunch of actions that aren’t in integrity with that and you’re not changing the blueprint, your life is going to come back into integrity with that. It’s like pulling a rubber band and it snaps back, right? Also, if you’re doing all these things and maybe even in the case where you have all kinds of what the world would say good things – you have money, you have family, you have opportunity – but you’re still unhappy, there’s something in your blueprint, there’s something in your self-concept that you’re not pursuing or that you’re not fulfilling.

This is why that saying says, He or she who is right in mind, they can do all the wrong things and it will turn out right; but, he or she who is wrong in mind, they can do all the right things, it will turn out wrong. Why? What that means is whatever your self-concept or blueprint is, if you’re trying to do a bunch of actions that aren’t in integrity with that and you’re not changing the blueprint, your life is going to come back into integrity with that. It’s like pulling a rubber band and it snaps back, right? Also, if you’re doing all these things and maybe even in the case where you have all kinds of what the world would say good things – you have money, you have family, you have opportunity – but you’re still unhappy, there’s something in your blueprint, there’s something in your self-concept that you’re not pursuing or that you’re not fulfilling.

I remember hearing one story about a person who had all this money and all fame and fortune and was depressed. No amount of anti-depressants or anything was pulling her out of it. Through discussion, she discovered that what she always really wanted was children, was to have a man that loved her and to have a real family and to have children. She was well-beyond that particular prime. Nothing, no amount of worldly fame, fortune, success or acquisition could make her happy, because this unconscious blueprint and self-concept was that she would someday be a person with a family of her own. No amount of friends and all of that could even help. Upon deeper introspection, when the idea came that well, she could just adopt and have children, that didn’t work either. She did dig deeper and deeper. She should find out what’s the quality, what would she get, what’s the feeling she would get if she had children of her own, why did it have to be children of her own? She ultimately discovered that it was because she would feel loved. Because if it was just adopted children, they wouldn’t owe her any real debt of love, and so it had to be her own children or there wouldn’t be real lasting unconditional love there. When she understood that what she really needed was more love, then she could begin to organize her life to focus on that, to get the love.

There are certain things that we may have self-concepts of that we will never get in the world, but it’s not the thing that we want. It’s the way it makes us feel. It’s not the money. It’s the way it makes us feel. It’s not the fame. It’s the way it makes us feel. It’s not the child of our own or a gene, but it’s the way it makes us feel. In any case, she had to dig through the layers. What is it she really wanted? Ultimately, discovered it was this. She was able to arrange her life and see how much love was in her life and how many people loved her, and then she could even potentially adopt and she could bring the love and receive the love and be fulfilled. That’s an important little distinction, if whatever the thing is can never be achieved. If you always wanted to be an NBA basketball player, and you’re well passed the prime where you could actually be a player, maybe you could be a coach. Maybe you could do something in that field or complementary or supplementary or side by side, or maybe it’s something else about it, a quality that you could begin to design into your life through other means that would give you the same level of congruence.

The key is that we have to find congruence. If you have a blueprint or a self-concept that’s limiting or destructive like I’m just a person who can’t make a lot of money. I wasn’t wired for that. I’m just big bones. I’m never going to be thin, or whatever the case may be, you have to do one of two things. You have to either, again, find the quality that you really want, independent of the change. I highly recommend that. As a rule of thumb, just always go for the quality, because the quality of feeling is what we’re always really after. If there’s still the possibility of obtaining the form, then you want to align your life and organize your life around that, and then you need to change your blueprint. You need to change your self-concept. You need to do the inner work to discover some principle. Let’s say around abundance, that there’s no such thing as a person that’s not capable of being abundant. Even though it may be a condition that that was your experience, you can recondition yourself. You can understand the principles. You can apprentice under the laws of wealth and abundance and begin to develop a consciousness of wealth and abundance, and therefore a consciousness or a self-concept that you are a wealthy and abundant person. You can begin to let go of those limited self-concepts and redesign your blueprint around abundance. As that gets established, that same mechanism that is always moving you towards congruence, it’s always operating anyways. It’s now operating on that blueprint.

This is another very important distinction. This is why ultimately the way we’re meant to grow is not to forcing or pushing or making things happened but making what’s already true welcome that when we become internally congruent, meaning we develop a blueprint or self-concept and condition ourselves to feel and believe and be in alignment with what we really want, then the law of life does the heavy lifting, right? The law of gravity is always pulling. If I pick up a pen, and I drop it, it’s going to get pulled down by the law of gravity. I don’t have to do the work and force the pen down. Likewise, I don’t have to do the work of forcing my life to be wealthy and abundant, but I do have to do the work of developing an inner blueprint that I am a wealthy abundant person, which is in alignment with the greater truth. Ultimately, we’re not just seeking to make ourselves congruent with our own personal blueprint. We’re seeking to make ourselves congruent with the truth of all being, with the great truth –the great truths that we are one with God, one with life, that we are unique emanations of infinite love, power, joy, abundance, power, joy, abundance, health, wealth, harmony, order, brilliance, genius, etc. That’s always pulling on us and pushing on us, but, again, as I said in the beginning, it’s moving through our own filter, our own blueprint, and our own self-concept. So, we want to align ourselves ultimately with the grand blueprint. There’s a unique way the grand blueprint of truth is trying to express as us. When we talk about our highest destiny or purpose, we’re talking about our unique expression of the grand blueprint. Our work is to come into ever increasing and inner alignment to condition ourselves, so that we feel and believe and see ourselves with a blueprint that matches our highest good and our highest desire. The law of life operates automatically on that to bring our experience into congruence with it. Just as I said before, if our inner blueprint is that I’m fat and I’m big-boned, and I don’t have the abilities to really make much of myself, then that same principle

So, we want to align ourselves ultimately with the grand blueprint. There’s a unique way the grand blueprint of truth is trying to express as us. When we talk about our highest destiny or purpose, we’re talking about our unique expression of the grand blueprint. Our work is to come into ever increasing and inner alignment to condition ourselves, so that we feel and believe and see ourselves with a blueprint that matches our highest good and our highest desire. The law of life operates automatically on that to bring our experience into congruence with it. Just as I said before, if our inner blueprint is that I’m fat and I’m big-boned, and I don’t have the abilities to really make much of myself, then that same principle is operating to bring us into integrity with that. It doesn’t make us feel good ultimately. It makes us feel sad or depressed or frustrated or angry because that blueprint is ultimately not in alignment with the grand blueprint.

I know I’m giving you a lot here, and I really invite you to really listen to this more than once, but, again, I want you to get the levels here. Whenever we’re out of alignment with our self-concept or blueprint, our life will never feel right, and it will always be working to bring us back in alignment with that blueprint, even if the blueprint is limited. We have to recondition ourselves to have a very big self-concept and to be a blueprint or self-concept that is what we truly want, so that that love, life, is operating upon that. However, we’ll never be truly satisfied or fulfilled if our blueprint doesn’t match, or isn’t increasingly coming into alignment with, the grand blueprint. If you settle for something less than your best or settle for something less than your unique greatness and excellence, even if it’s what the world would call a pretty good life, you’re never going to be truly satisfied or fulfilled, because there’s a much bigger blueprint trying to emerge through you. Ultimately, you realize that safety and well-being and true happiness is never found in any static situation. I wanted to say the static quo, not just the status quo. Why? Because it’s always found in progress. Why? Because the Universe is progressive. Why? Because it’s infinite. There’s an infinite blueprint forever trying to emerge through and as you, so there’s no stopping point as Jesus said, Foxes have holes and birds have nests, but there is no place for man to rest his weary head. I shall not rest until I rest in thee, meaning our only resting place is in the divine, in the infinite eternal nature of our being.

That true joy and happiness is on that emerging edge of ever-expanding, ever-evolving increase and progress. The first step is to look at our own inner self-concept, our own inner blueprint and see is it in alignment with our highest desires, our greatest desires or have we acquiesced to limiting conditioning? Are we merely trying to change the outer world while remaining the same? Are we just trying to lose weight or make money or win friends and influence others when internally we believe we’re not worthy, we’re not capable and we’re not able? Understand that’s like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic. The ship is going down no matter what you do externally. You need to plug the holes internally. You need to redesign your inner self-concept and blueprint. Finally, when you do that, you don’t have to make it happen. You are making it welcome in the law of life. The law of mind operates upon that newly-enhanced blueprint and brings your life into integrity, into congruence with it.

Just one final reminder, when the thing you think you want in your life seems to be something that’s out of your reach, beyond the stage of your life that you’re in, I don’t want to say as a disclaimer or a caveat, be careful to jump to that right away, because when you think it might be too late for or you might be too old, too tall, too short, too this, too that for, you might be wrong. So, before you decide it’s too late or you’re not enough and it’s just never going to happen, really investigate it, because there are many, many, many stories of people that have done the thing they truly wanted far beyond the time and what the world says is the capacity to achieve it. Like the 98-year-old man that runs up the flight of the Empire State Building, runs the stairs along with 20 something’s and 30 something’s. He’s 98 years old and that’s just his warm-up to run a marathon – or a 70-some-year-old woman who gets started running like in her 50s and ends up running multiple marathons and Ironman’s, or the woman that becomes a doctor in her 70s – or Grandma Moses becomes a world famous painter in her 80s. So, be very careful to accept any form of limitation. The basketball player who’s short, I forget the exact height, maybe five-foot something and becomes like an NBA player – or the story of the football player, Notre Dame, where he has this little runt. They made a movie about it – Rudy, and he’s just like it’s impossible, and he keeps getting rejected and failing and rejected and failing and he never gives up. Ultimately, he proves that if you don’t have a talent but you have the heart, you can do it – or Seabiscuit, the horse that defied all odds.

So, be very careful to jump any limitation. If in fact you ultimately get to the place where it really seems by all investigation, all research, that you’re 60 and you wanted to have children naturally – although, I think there are some stories for that has happened – perhaps that’s just not going to be the way you go. You’re 50 or 60 and you’ve always want to play in the NBA, and that’s probably not going to happen, then you break it down like I said before, and you discover what are some of the other ways you can have that feeling, that experience. What is the feeling you’re after if you were to be doing that? Then, you start to design a life that gives you those feelings and gets you as close to the heat as possible, and you can make yourself congruent, and you can experience a life of fulfillment and happiness and fulfill your true destiny and purpose, because there is no shelf life on your destiny. There is no Use by this datestamp on the back of your neck. Again, it may not be that you do the thing you think you should but from a soul level, the soul is not so much concerned about the quantity or the form. The soul’s fulfillment has to do with the blossoming of its qualities. So, like I said, if you can’t be an NBA player, that’s not so much what the soul cares about. Your true purpose and fulfillment is about the full blossoming of your character and the qualities of your being. You break it down and find what those are, you redesign your life around that, you condition your blueprints so that it’s congruent and then your life continues to flourish and bring itself into alignment with that. Even when you stumble and fall and things seem to go wrong, once your blueprint is established, that mechanism of your mind will keep moving you back on track, back on track, back on track.

I hope this has served you. Again, it’s a little bit of a complex concept so please listen to this more thanonce if you need to, and then do the work. Design your blueprint, your self-concept and recondition yourself so it is congruent with the larger blueprint of life and with the life you really want to live and then organize your life around that. I hope this has served you. If you want to get more training, please make sure to sign up, register for this podcast, Emergence on iTunes. Go to derekrydall.com/blogs and get the latest blog post. Register for that so you never miss a powerful training or any powerful material, because there’s new and unique stuff that’s only delivered in these channels. You can also go to the resource section at derekrydall.com and get some powerful downloads and additional training and support material. If this is adding value to you, if you like what you’re hearing, please share it with a friend, a loved one. Even try to teach it to somebody. The more you teach it or the more you share it, the more you activate and accelerate the learning in your own life. Until next time, remember to live authentically, love unconditionally and follow your destiny.

(Bonus Episode) Why You Can’t Save the World …and Why You Shouldn’t

(Bonus Episode) Why You Can’t Save the World …and Why You Shouldn’t

Aren’t we here to save the world, or at least make it a better place?

Actually, the answer is “no.”

The “world” that each of us perceives is really a collection of beliefs or agreements about what’s possible and what’s right. It’s a set of values, norms, and mores that vary from country to country, culture to culture, and even from person to person.

Trying to save or improve a set of beliefs is like trying to save a dream or hold on to an idea.

As we know from the Emergence principle, however, there’s always a bigger idea or pattern emerging, like when a seed is unfolding and emerging into a plant and ultimately into the grand idea, the grand pattern of a mighty tree.

You are not here to save the seed, to protect it from cracking open and falling apart.

You are here to serve the emerging paradigm, the new vision, the larger idea of yourself – and the world – that is currently emerging through you.

And, when you move away from being a problem-solver, and become a vision holder instead, you tap into this infinite pattern of wholeness and perfection that’s always there, but that you have not seen because you’ve been struggling to solve what appears to be “wrong” with the world, with your life, or with some aspect of your life, such as your work, your relationship, or your health.

You’re not here to just be a better acorn, just to be a better nut. You are here to sprout and, ultimately, to let the mighty oak of your being emerge.

Listen to “Why You Can’t Save the World …And Why You Shouldn’t” now to set down your problems and watch your grandest vision begin to emerge!

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