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It can be very challenging to know when to stay the course and when to switch lanes. As I’ve taught, one of the most important things to do as a creator and entrepreneur is to pick a lane and to stay with it until you reach a specific result — no matter how challenging it is.
This level of commitment and focus brings up all the unconscious limitations that need to be healed, released, or integrated — and leads to building real soul stamina, resilience, and character. When we follow every shiny object and switch back and forth when things get difficult, boring, or unsure, we thwart our evolutionary progress.
It’s like circling the runway — we never get liftoff speed or escape velocity. In other words, we have no momentum. And without momentum, it takes all of your existing energy just to keep things moving. There’s no leverage, no capacity for deep creativity and innovation.
I struggled and suffered from this syndrome for many years until I understood the power of picking a lane and sticking with it with total commitment, no matter what, for a certain period of time. The result was that my work took a quantum leap — going from barely nothing to a global business in just over a year.
In order to succeed, one must develop the capacity for sustained focus. This is a key distinction that separates achievers from non-achievers. Non-achievers stop when things get hard, when they get bored, or when the results aren’t forthcoming. Achievers stay the course until they reach the finish line, no matter how hard it is.
This isn’t easy. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “God will not do His works through cowards.” Making real chance, making a real difference, and fulfilling your potential requires courage, strength, and a willingness to buck the trends of human thinking. That’s why so few ever do it!
You have to be willing to challenge and ultimately transmute limited beliefs and conditioning. You have to be willing to do what must be done, even when you don’t feel like it, even when people and conditions seem against you. But the result is a life worth living — a life where you are living on the emerging edge of possibility.
As the saying goes, “If you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much space!”
Now, a common question around staying the course is, “How do I know if I’m meant to keep going or change directions?” This is often accompanied by sayings like, “Things are so hard, it must be a sign from the universe that I’m not meant to do this.”
Let me make this very clear: things being hard is NOT a sign from the universe that you’re meant to stop. If that was the case, just about every person who has ever made a significant difference in their life or the world would have quit!
The only sign from the universe that you might be meant to change directions is that you no longer desire the thing you were striving for. But even this can be tricky. Often, after much effort, the dust and grit of the journey can cover up your burning desire, to such an extent that you can barely feel it anymore, if at all.
[bctt tweet=”One of the most important signs that you’re meant to stay the course is that you deeply desire it.” username=”derekrydall”]
To check this, just ask the question, “If I was guaranteed success, guaranteed to be brilliant at this, and to be well received, and I could do it in a way that truly fulfills me, would I still want this?” This helps to override the ego’s threshold and the weariness that the journey has built up. If this sparks your desire again, stay the course. This is a sign of what’s trying to emerge…
You might discover along the way that new insights, new inspiration, new vision, new capacity and new opportunity starts to show up in your life. Before you know it, you’re getting hired somewhere or you’re doing something unexpected. That’s not an accident, that’s emergence. You just couldn’t have pictured it or imagined it from where you were before. This is a result of staying the course.
The key is to remain mindful, because if you’re a creative entrepreneurial type, you can have all kinds of new ideas and possibilities arise that tempt you to change course. You must stay vigilante. Ask yourself if you’re just tired, scared, bored, frustrated, and wanting relief…or if things have really changed and it’s time to make a different move.
Most likely it’s the former. The fact is, most people are just not willing to develop the inner fortitude it takes to stay on track long enough to get real, sustainable results. The main reason is that it requires real change, not just cosmetic makeovers. You have to actually become a different, more expanded, better version of yourself — if you want to keep creating better results.
To the ego, real change is equivalent to danger or death. So it will bring out all the heavy artillery to try and make you back away from the border of change. It’s had a long time to master this process — and it really thinks it’s protecting you. But if you want to make real progress and create real growth and success, you need to challenge this part of yourself and see through its coping mechanism.
Bottom line, you need to make a choice and pick a lane — then stick with it for a specific period of time until you get a specific outcome. And you need to do this no matter how hard it gets. If you’re willing, you will not only make real progress — something most people never do — but you will become an evolved version of your previous self!
Make the commitment today. Create a real vision, with a real plan — then put it on your calendar. Find an accountability partner, someone who also wants to make important changes in their life, and commit to supporting each other. This could make all the difference.
Listen to an in-depth podcast on this subject, where we break it down and talk about how to put it into real-life practice TODAY. This will be a real game-changer!
And remember, self-help is shelf help – you have everything you need already!
Stay inspired!
Derek
Other powerful free trainings in the podcast library:
Why ALL Your Beliefs Limit You (And What You Should Do Instead)
Why Going With the Flow is Wrong
Why You Can’t Get What You Don’t Have
To get these trainings now or see more episodes available, CLICK HERE!
PS – Like this episode? Please share it! Full Transcript
[The following is the full transcript of this episode of the Emergence, A Revolutionary Path for Radical Life Change, with Derek Rydall Podcast]
Derek Rydall here, and I want to welcome you to another episode of Emergence, the revolutionary path for radical life change, where we’re diving deep into the core principles of life that lead to consistent and dependable success and growth, to really living and growing and unfolding the way we were designed, which all of nature reflects back to us, but we have unfortunately become disconnected from. Our true nature is that we are individualized expressions of life. All the power, presence, substance, wealth, health and life, everything that is necessary to truly create our masterpiece, to paint our masterpiece on the canvas of time and space, to display our destiny of greatness, all of that is already here. It’s already within us. It’s already who and what we are, just as electricity is already everywhere, but we have to create the structure to plug into it. Likewise, everything that we need to be all we were created to be is already here. The process of growth and unfoldment and success isn’t about making it happen. It’s about making what is already happening welcome. It’s about creating the inner and outer conditions that are congruent to it that it may become manifest through us and as us.
We’re talking on this topic when to stay the course and when to change directions. This is a really common challenge for a lot of creative types and entrepreneurs and really just spiritually-minded, heart-centered people that are wanting to be about something. It can be very challenging to know when to stay the course and when to change, when to switch lanes. As I’ve often talked about, one of the most important things to do as a creator and entrepreneurial type is to pick a lane and to stay in that lane. That’s really, really difficult to choose when you have so many possible ways to go, or you’re just not sure and you want some kind of guarantee and assurance before you get all in. You try to joggle multiple things and play the field, and you find that nothing ends up growing, and you don’t gain any real momentum. I struggled and suffered from that for many years until I understood the power of picking a lane and sticking with it with total commitment no matter what for a certain period of time. The reason for that is that character is not developed when things are going easy. Character, which ultimately determines your destiny, is developed when things are challenging, when things are difficult, when things don’t go your way.
That’s when you develop character. In the same way that you don’t develop muscles by lifting a weight that’s so easy and doesn’t do anything to you. It has to tear the muscle. It has to do something in order to actually cause the muscle to tear and cause it to develop. If you’re not tearing your muscle, you’re not growing your muscle. It doesn’t mean you can’t maintain without tearing it, but if you’re going to grow, if you’re going to keep growing and unfolding and evolving and not merely maintaining the same status quo, you have to be going beyond comfort, convenience, yet go into those thresholds of consciousness, those boundaries of your known self-concepts and your concepts about life. You have to cross those thresholds. You have to break down those walls. You have to challenge and ultimately transmute limited beliefs and conditioning. That’s a never-ending process, because your true nature is infinite. It’s always unfolding. There’s always something more, always something new, always something next. Ultimately, you learn to live on that edge, that emerging edge, that evolutionary edge. As the old saying goes, If you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much space.
Along this journey the question that arises, if you have had the courage to pick a lane, is when to stay the course and when to change? I want to tell you right out of the gate, for all of you metaphysical, spiritually-minded individuals, this is what I want you to get very clear, because this is one of the most common statements or questions. When things get hard, people will say, Maybe that’s just a sign from the Universe that I’m not supposed to keep going. I really want you to hear this: Things being hard, even really, really hard, is not a sign from the Universe that you’re supposed to stop. Think about it. If that was the case, then look at all of the greatest inventions and innovations in pretty much every area. How much challenge and strife and struggle, Martin Luther King, Jr. would have quit a long time before he ultimately made the kind of progress he did. Gandhi, Mother Teresa, Buddha, Jesus. Buddha suffered and struggled for years trying to understand and to break through. Jesus was hunted down and persecuted. Gandhi was constantly challenged by the British government. Mother Teresa was thought to be crazy and a fool and got sick and had all kinds of challenges. Thomas Edison failed purportedly thousands, if not up to ten thousand, times to discover and develop the light bulb. Walt Disney went bankrupt twice. Colonel Sanders tried to give away his chicken recipe somewhere over a thousand times, just giving it away for free. He couldn’t get anybody to take it. He persisted, something around a 1,003 or 1,006 somebody gave him the graciousness of just trying it out.
Over and over and over again, you see the story. If challenge and strife and even suffering was a sign from the Universe you’re supposed to quit, we’d still be in the dark ages. I want you from now and forevermore to erase that silly statement from your mind, Oh, it must be a sign from the Universe. No. The most important signs from the Universe are the ones you have within you, because the Universe is really in you. You’re not in the world. The whole world is in your consciousness. One of the most important signs that you’re meant to stay the course is your desire. The desire in its truest meaning is a root of the sire, or of the creative principle, of the Father, of the creative principle. It’s an indication of what’s in you trying to emerge. As long as you desire it, then it’s true.
Now, a caveat to that is it’s like it hears you now saying, Well, when it gets really, really hard, I don’t want it. I felt like I don’t want it anymore. You have to identify or discern the difference between truly not wanting something and just being burnt out or overwhelmed or disappointed, because the dust and grit and debris of the journey can cover up the spark, snuff out that flame and turn it into various sparks on the backbone of your soul, barely a pilot light, and it can feel like you don’t want it anymore. Sometimes, that’s an appropriate evolutionary process. It’s an erosion process that’s breaking down your ego, breaking down your willfulness, because as one of my mentors, Michael Beckwith, says, Where there’s a will, there’s a wall, but where there’s willingness, there’s always a way. Sometimes, we go in for our desire with a lot of willfulness and just pure will and force and push. Ultimately, as we grow and develop, we need to become more of a channel, an instrument for a higher power, a higher movement rather than merely being an ego that’s trying to make something happen. That can be eroded. It can feel like we don’t have as much desire, but what’s really happening is we’re becoming more and more surrendered.
One of the other things is it just can get covered up by the dust and grit of a journey, and so you need to ask a question to override that particular state of consciousness. You can ask, If I was guaranteed to succeed, if I was guaranteed to be well-received and guaranteed to be brilliant and good at it, do I still want this? Maybe you’re feeling tired and burnt out and disappointed in dissolution, but when you sincerely ask, If I could still have this and it could be easy and I could do what I want to do with it and create and contribute the way I want, with who I want, where I want, how I want, do I still want it? If you ask sincerely, and it’s merely been covered up by debris, you’ll feel that little kick, that little twinkling again. You’ll be like, Oh, yeah, I do want it. I’m sad, I’m disillusioned, I’m disappointed, I’m burnt out by all the struggle, but if I could really still write that book or make that impact or have that relationship or whatever the contribution might be, I really do still want that. I don’t know how I can get it. I feel a lot of doubt about it but I do want it. Then, that’s the sign you are meant to stay the course.
Some people would say that that’s giving false hope, because sometimes you could want the thing that you’re just not cut out for, like you want to be an NBA basketball player, and you’re 5’, or you’re 45 years old or something like that, and in that case, I would ask you to really check and see is that really your burning desire? If it is, then you can use the visioning process, the visualization process, to get into the feeling tone and be open to other ways that that vision is trying to unfold. What are some other versions of it? Maybe it’s not being an NBA player. Now, I’m not saying it’s not possible, because there are examples of people over the age that had become professional athletes or under the right height that had become professional athletes. So, I’m not saying you shouldn’t, and especially if there’s a burning desire, but sometimes that impulse to be or do or have something is being misinterpreted, that if you didn’t become an NBA basketball player, or you didn’t become the president of United States, whatever it might be, that if you could be involved in that world, that would feel just as good –a commentator, an author, a blogger, a videographer, somebody that’s commentating, expressing, creating in that area – that might feel just as inspiring and empowering. So, I’m not telling you to let go of the big vision, and I’m not saying that you let any of those worldly limits get in your way. For example, there are people, Grandma Moses became one of the world’s famous artists in her 70s or 80s. People had become doctors in their 70s and maybe even later. All manner of things happen in ways that define logic or defy what the world says it has to be, so I’m not telling you not to because of those. I’m just saying that sometimes what we think we want does contain the essence of what we want, but the exact form may not ultimately be what we think it will be.
That’s why I always say you can use visualization to access the qualities of feeling and being. You can do the LIFT process. If you don’t know what the LIFT process is, I would invite you to listen to the podcast where I talked about that and/or get the Emergineering program or the Emergence book and learn how to integrate that process. In any case, if you do that process and endeavor in advance towards your dream, your vision, as you come in to vibrational alignment with it, if the picture is not quite right, you’ll be course-corrected. Okay? The key is if you still want it, if you ask those questions and you move away some of the dust and debris and you still want it, then you are meant to still keep going for it. Again, we don’t know what the ultimate outcome will look like, but there’s something in that desire that is telling you something is in you trying to be born. That’s the key. As you do the work to come into the vibrational alignment with it, as you do the work to go for it and stay the course through those thresholds of fear, doubt, lack, limitation, challenge and it causes you to dig deeper and stick by something when all seems lost and build up the courage, the confidence, the strength, the faith, the resolve and the stamina, all of that is developing your character. It’s making you a stronger and stronger instrument to create and contribute and show up, stand up, speak up, speak out and be who you really are in a more powerful bold way.
You might discover along the way of one particular journey, as you’re becoming this individual as a result of staying on the course, that suddenly new insights, new inspiration, new vision, new capacity and new opportunity starts to show up in your life. Before you know it, you’re getting hired somewhere or you’re doing something. That’s not an accident. That is the unfoldment. You just couldn’t have pictured it or imagined it from where you were before. Much like the caterpillar. The caterpillar is following its impulse. It starts eating and eating and eating and doing all this stuff. Pretty soon, it pushes itself into a catalyzing state where it starts in the process of becoming a butterfly. Eventually, it creates a cocoon. It liquefies. All that wonderful stuff happens. It literally dies to the caterpillar, reborn as a butterfly, and now it is flying in an all new atmosphere. Well, if the caterpillar had a vision for its life, and it wanted to build the best caterpillar life possible, and that drove it to do whatever it’s doing, it drove it to an edge where it began this catalytic process of becoming a butterfly. That initial vision drove it there, but what it ultimately becomes was beyond its self-concept. It couldn’t have imagined the butterfly life.
The truth is you can’t really imagine what your destiny is, because it’s outside of imagination. Imagination is just a rearranging of existing known things. It’s a wonderful tool, but ultimately your vision lives in what I called the emergination, which is the imagination of the soul. We can’t really imagine. We have our best guess. We go forth, we stay the course, we build the character, and we come in to complete vibrational attunement or integrity with it. It changes us from the inside out as we stay the course. We build all kinds of skills and capacities and qualities of being. We become a better and better version of ourselves. Sometimes, the vision looks somewhat like what we imagined, or at least in the ballpark, and other times we’re taking on an event that takes us into places that we never imagined, but is always good and even often better than what we imagine. That’s why it’s no problem to start with the vision that may or may not be the exact accurate picture. As long as you do the LIFT work to come into vibrational alignment with it, because the vibrational qualities of it can never go wrong. If you’re developing more and more quality of abundance, joy, power, peace, love, etc., you can’t go wrong with that, because that’s universal. According to your unique pattern, it will begin to shape and form itself. That will lead you into new directions.
We must pick a lane and stay the course. Obviously, you have to develop a vision. You have to know where you’re going. If you don’t know where you’re going, every road will take you there, and you’ll be lost. You have to have a vision, and that’s the work we go through in the Emergineering process or the Soul Purpose Blueprint work. Now, you’re on course, and you stay the course. You pick a time period, so that for the minimum, 6 months, 12 months, for me, it was initially 18 months, you’re going to go for a particular result, and you’re not going to let up until you get that result. You’re going to do all the work to grow mentally, emotionally, spiritually, creatively as otherwise along the way. As a result, you will be a better version of yourself. Perhaps you’ll continue to stay in that direction, or you’ll discover after all there’s a new direction, but you’ve built the character now. You’ve overcome some core karmic patterns, and you now built the character to really now take the next leg of your journey.
Now, when is it time to change directions? Well, there’s a couple times. One is when in all sincerity the thing you are going for you truly, truly do not want anymore. That’s an evolutionary ark that happens to people where you are going for one thing. In fact, in the world of drama and storytelling, they call it a false goal. You see a lot of movies where the character has a false goal. Oftentimes, it ends bittersweet or tragic, where they only realize at the very end what they really wanted, like Citizen Kane where he’s going for all these riches and success, which was really a reaction to a wound. At the end, all he wants when he’s dying in his big mansion alone, all he wants is Rosebud, which is his sled when he was a little boy, which represents family and love and connection and innocence. At the end of the day, that’s what his soul really wanted, but he had lost it along the way, so it becomes a tragedy or a cautionary tale. You see that in stories.
Sometimes you see it like in Rain Man, Tom Cruise thinks what he really wants is to control his brother and get the money from the estate or make money from these cars, and at the end all he really wants is a real relationship with his only family, his brother. That’s bittersweet because at the end, he gets the relationship, but he loses his brother. He can’t keep him. So, we see that in stories all the time, these false goals that when a character goes for them, if they keep going, eventually it changes them. In some cases, they realize the error of their ways in time and they switch courses, and that’s a triumph. In other times, they get part of the goal but not the full goal, that’s bitter sweet. In other times, they don’t get it all, but they realize it or will realize it was a false goal, and that’s a tragedy.
The same is true with you. As you’re going along, and let’s say you think what you really want is to have a big business and make millions of dollars, get a mansion and a Ferrari, whatever that might be, and as you’re growing and developing emotionally, mentally and spiritually, things happen that transform you and deepen you. At some point along the way, you really get that making all this money is not my goal after all. It’s really not what matters to me. I’ve really changed. What really matters to me is making this contribution or having this family or maybe a completely different industry. After all, I really just want to be an artist. Like the story of the guy who was felt pressured by his parents to become a doctor. He pursued being a plastic surgeon, and what it was was this artistic impulse put into the most hopefully, in his mind, the way he can make the most money. Eventually, he was very unhappy and realized it was a false goal, being a plastic surgeon, and he wanted to be an artist. Like the lawyer who felt pressured by his parents to become a lawyer and ultimately got cancer and decided he was going to go for what he really wanted and that was music. He began to play music and learn music, and he was healed. These are examples of where we go for a false goal, but we really get through circumstances, through inner experience, that that’s no longer what we want. It’s clear, and it’s replaced by what we do want. Sometimes, it can just go away, and we don’t know what we want. We experience a dark night. Other times, we get really clear, suddenly or incrementally, this is just not what I want or care about anymore. What I really want and care about is this. That’s an obvious example of when it’s time to change directions when we really don’t want it anymore.
The other time is where it just already evolved. It might not be as dramatic or drastic, but it just evolves. Like for me, I started off as an actor, and at a certain point, I had a spiritual opening, and it wasn’t really a conscious choice per se, but I was just so pulled and driven to go on this inward journey that the outer pursuit of acting became unimportant to me. It wasn’t even like a conscious choice. It wasn’t like the outer experience of acting was so hard and painful that I wanted to change it. It was just this inner experience was so powerful I couldn’t resist it. Then, as I went on, I started writing, and I was developingmyself as a screen writer. That didn’t take off initially, but I found out I was really good at talking about story, and almost organically, as I begin to pursue where the interest was, I grew into a story consultant and script consultant. There was this kind of organic awareness that that was a door that was opening. I could make money. I could learn the craft even more. I could be of service. I could get all these needs met by pursuing that. Then, at a certain point, it became clear that that was no longer fulfilling enough, that I really wanted to be writing my own stuff. So, I began writing my own stuff, or rather I began getting hired to write other people’s stuff, instead of just consulting to write whole screen plays. Eventually, that wasn’t fulfilling enough, and I realized what I really want to do is write my own stuff. So, I began writing my own stuff and getting other people to hire me to do that. Eventually, I got really cleared that I wanted to write a book about how I did it all.
These goals emerged organically, and there was like little incremental steps or little incremental turns, and then eventually I was consulting, and then eventually I was bringing in spirituality into my consulting. Then eventually that drove me to write another book, There’s No Business Like Show Business, on consciousness and creativity and the media. Then I saw that, as I developed the platform to market that book, I began to learn marketing, online marketing and all these new areas in order to make that project successful. That led eventually to me wanting to just be a coach, a transformational coach. Now, I took all that I’ve learned from that and began to apply it there. You see there was like this incremental gradual evolution. At certain points, I had to make a decision – try to keep this other alive and do this other thing or eventually put all my attention into the new thing and let go of the other. That was hard. I had to again choose and let go of some good stuff that was working in order to go for this thing that I really wanted.
When to change directions is either because you truly lose the desire. It’s just not there anymore. You just don’t want it anymore. You don’t want to do anymore, not because of burnout, but because you really changed. The other thing is organically a new direction arises, and it’s often a progression to one side or the other of what you’re doing. Now, you have to be mindful, because if you’re a creative entrepreneurial type, you can have all kinds of new ideas arise, new possibilities arise. I’m not talking about Shiny Object Syndrome. I’m talking about you are steadfast and committed to a result, and you are all in and you’re working, like I was a story consultant or a screen writer. I mean I was really, reallydoing it. I wasn’t just playing at it. I was committed to very specific outcomes. That evolved into new tributaries. That’s different than What about this? What about that? What about this? What about that? Now, the what about this, what about that came into play when I had multiple possibilities, because something new was emerging and I had to see, I had to try. I was trying to hold onto the thing that was passing and the new thing that was emerging. That’s when I had to be willing to let go. Ultimately, when the Law of Emergence became evident to me, I had to once again be all in committed fully. For me, I chose a minimum of 18 months to be all in, create the program, create the offering, launch it, and see how it went. I wasn’t going to stop for a minimum of 18 months. That’s when all of my work was taken to yet a whole another level.
These are the things we want to begin to discern: When to stay the course, when to change directions? I can tell you for many of you, just from my experience, the biggest challenge is staying the course. The biggest challenge is being committed. The biggest challenge is picking a lane and staying in it when things get hard. They will get hard. You will bump up against lots of walls. You may experience loss. You may experience all kinds of rejection. You may experience every door close against you. You may experience what appears to be the whole world telling you you’re crazy, you’re wrong, this is not going to work as have many, many creative entrepreneurs, teachers, leaders. None of that means you should stop. Your work is to get clear that you still want it, that it’s still the vision and the mission, and then to do the deeper work that I teach – embracing the shadows, the values conflicts, strengthening the inner core, reconditioning so that you have soul stamina, so that you’re truly rooted and anchored within, getting the accountability partners, having coaches or mentors or group that can really support you and hold the space when you don’t feel like you can.
If you don’t have that kind of support around you, you must get it. Mentoring and coaching is a principle. It used to be the master apprentice model. We’ve lost that to our great detriment. The mastermind principle where you have a group of people that are supporting you in different ways is a principle that we used to have in some of the greatest innovators and leaders of the turn of the century and beyond, they have that. Look back in history, you see groups of individuals that were tight-knit, that were supporting each other, whether it was the industrialists of the industrial revolution or the Renaissance people that hang out together or the time of the Greek period where there’s Socrates and Aristotle and Plato and all those types of individuals forming together in mystery school. There was this group that came together, supported each other, bounced stuff off each other that held like a morphic field, their own attractor pattern that was separate and apart from the societal norms, so that they could keep lifting each other while society was constantly trying to pull them back. They had mentors and masters that they could apprentice under so that they can continue to be lifted and lifted and lifted, where otherwise condition, society, their own patterns would pull them back and pull them down.
So, you need to have these. You need to have those structures in your life so that you can stay the course and you can get to that point where you grow beyond those thresholds, you truly grow, you truly develop character which determines your destiny and also can have the kind of healthy feedback that can help you make the decision when it’s time to change direction. I invite you to really take this to heartfelt consideration and to take some kind of action, whether it’s a deeper commitment to stay the course, whether it’s a reevaluation if it’s time to change directions, but do some work on this today. If you don’t have a coach or a mentor or support group, get one. We serve people in that way. Obviously, I coach. We have master coaches here at the Emerging Edge Community as well as Mastermind and in the Emergence Academy, which is a very inexpensive way to get that kind of support on an on-going basis. Wherever you get it, get it because you need it. We all do.
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